Post by King Richius on Feb 17, 2019 10:09:55 GMT -5
Prologue: What’s Wrong with Vanilla?
Framingham, MA : Feb. 10, 2019
I almost missed Scott’s call.
I had to trade in my Nokia flip phone for a new iPhone and I’m still getting used to the generic ring tones. They all sound so lame compared to Led Zeppelin’s “Dazed and Confused” but I‘m not paying to re-download ringtones the tech guy couldn’t transfer. Not to mention that anybody who thinks these mini tablets are better than a flip phone never saw The Matrix or Star Trek. That clicking noise as it snaps open… the coolest. Swiping right to answer a call… no where near as satisfying. Gonna’ take a while to get used to the new phone.
I’m rambling. Point is I didn’t miss Scott’s call although soon enough I would wish I did.
Hey there Scott. What’s on your mind?
As my agent at Championship Connections, I’m pretty sure it’s something to do with money or PR. Good thing Scott’s around to take care of that crap for me because if left in my hands… well I might not have nearly as much money or good will with the fans.
I heard about your next match. I think it’s obvious where Lila is going with this.
No duh. Stevie Wonder can see it coming.
The less said about it for now the better. I sucked as a referee and Lila’s gonna’ make sure I pay a high price for it.
Aren’t you worried?
Not really. I can handle whatever Lila throws my way.
I hope so, for both our sakes.
Odd. I expected my agent to mirror my bravado but instead I’m getting a definite negative vibe from him. After all we’ve been through he’s losing faith now?
Why are you going all drama queen on me?
Because I’ve seen the numbers Frank. Did you know that La Pantera Negra merch outsold the Lethal Weapon merch almost three to one last month? And she was playing the bad guy! Bad guys aren’t supposed to outsell the good guys.
C’mon man. The La Pantera Negra shirt with the glow in the dark eyes… that was cool!
Whoever Daphne went to for her shirt design does better than whoever Scott hired to design my shirts. I’m wearing one of those glow in the dark La Pantera Negra shirts right now! But the decline in sales is my fault, not some lame ass shirt designer.
Maybe, maybe not. You’re missing the point.
How ‘bout you clear it up for me.
Daphne and others are outselling you because you’re too plain. You’re a single scoop of vanilla ice cream standing next to a bunch of banana splits with all the toppings.
What’s wrong with vanilla ice cream? I like it.
So?
Without the International Championship, without the revolution, there’s not much there to sell.
Gee thanks bud. Now that you have World Champion Penny Shannon on the payroll who needs boring International Champion Frank Lynn, eh?
This has nothing to do with Penny, although even you have to admit she is far from boring. Her merch is flying off the shelves. Compared to her, your stuff is collecting dust before a quick trip to the BOGO bargain bin.
I guess it wasn’t the eye patch. Whether she has one or two good eyes, she’s more interesting than me. Yay for Penny.
Fact is, I need you to have the belt if I’m going to keep marketing you. Being the fighting champion is all we have going right now.
So this is your way of boosting my confidence, making sure I keep the belt even in light of what Lila clearly has planned.
Yes. You cannot lose that belt!
I do believe all five and half feet, one hundred fifty pounds when soaking wet, suit wearing nerd Scott just tried to lay down the law on me! Oh how I wish he were here in person so I could show him just how ready I am to defend my title… and my honor.
It’s all crystal clear now. I’m only useful to him if I have something to sell. The “revolution” worked for six months. The “fighting champion” worked for the past year. But this little piss ant is telling me that without the revolution or the belt I’m worthless to him.
Ungrateful jackass.
Well it’s not working. It’s pissing me off. I train hard, I fight hard, I win. If that isn’t enough for you to market then perhaps I should have a talk with Josh? Ask for a new agent who doesn’t find me so boring.
Aw sh*t Frank. I’m sorry. This isn’t coming off how I wanted it.
No it isn’t. Maybe you should hang up and form a new plan that doesn’t include making the current WFWF International Champion want to ram his fist down your throat.
I can hear the audible *gulp* as Scott realizes I’m not joking. I really do want to rearrange his face into a Picasso painting right now.
Yeah… I guess I should. Just do one thing for me. Don’t let Lila put you in a position where it’s impossible for you to successfully defend your title. Don’t let her screw you.
I don’t think she swings that way.
Huh?
Never mind. Talk to you later.
I don’t give him the chance to reply.
I don’t know what bothers me more: that he came out and told me to my face I’m boring or that deep down I know he may have a point. I’ve let Lila clip my wings for too long with her blackmail scheme. I have a trump card. I should use it.
WFWF Sin City Showdown RP
Stuck in the Middle
featuring Frank Lynn
Boston, MA : Feb. 12, 2019
The Smartest Person in the Room
Time for my monthly visit to the Legacy offices to discuss business matters with Abraham. Funny how much work I end up doing as a “silent partner”. Pretty obvious Abe is grooming me to one day take over. Question is how soon will that day be. He’s no spring chicken and two decades of boxing may have shortened what golden years he will get to enjoy.
As I walk up the stairs to his office, I can hear a meeting through the slightly open door. It’s Abe, the Dixons, and somebody else, someone speaking too low for their voice to carry.
From what I do hear, it’s obvious someone is trying to sign the Dixons away from Legacy and they’re having none of it. Eli speaks for the brothers rather loudly, pointing out that they are a tag team, why would they go to a company that has no tag division.
Then all three Dixons come storming out of the office, almost knocking me over. A few mumbled “sorry” and “excuse me” later and they are past me heading towards the training area laughing about the offer.
I dip my head into the office and see Abe behind the desk.
Everything okay Abe?
Everything’s fine Frank. We’re just wrapping up here.
That’s when the quiet figure in one of the guest chairs spins around. Goddamnit! It’s Lila f’n Sleater, somehow still looking smug despite the Dixons just turning down an offer to come to the WFWF.
Hello Frank.
Lila.
That’s all she’s getting from me. A cold acknowledgement of her presence and a nod of my head that I can’t stop myself from doing. My mother’s lessons in good manners are hard to forget, even in the presence of the wicked witch of the west.
Lila’s been scouting the Legacy talent, hoping to sign some new faces to debut after SuperBrawl.
I’m sorry Daphne turned down our offer. She did quite well against Mesh. I’m also sorry that the Dixons are set on staying in Legacy. Daryl in particular could be a big star in the WFWF but family bonds and a love of tag team wrestling… well, this time I struck out.
Her overall demeanor is that of a polite business woman but her eyes burn at me, as if I’m to blame for Daphne and the Dixons turning down her offers.
That’s too bad. You’re losing out on some really talented wrestlers. But it’s nothing Daphne or I said. We’d actually love to see more people from Legacy make the jump.
Why don’t I believe that?
At this point I realize Lila wants to hash something out, something that I’d rather Abe not be a part of.
Abe, you mind if we use your office for a few minutes? We need to have a private conversation.
Without a word, Abe nods his head knowingly and quickly departs his office closing the door behind him, leaving me and Lila alone.
Shall we take the gloves off?
By all means. There’s nothing I love more than witty banter with my wrestlers.
Actually, I have to sympathize a little with her. She’s had to deal with people like Trace Demon, Drakz, Kyzer, two generations of Ahrimans, and so on for years. No wonder she’s turned into a total bitch. But that doesn’t mean I’ll be her whipping boy.
You’re trying to f*** me over, aren’t you? A triple threat against Billy and Needles? We all know what that is actually about.
She does me the honor of not looking at me like a stupid child who just asked to eat cake for breakfast.
Are you going to cry foul play? You’re the one who couldn’t call the match and left me with no clear number one contender.
You knew I wasn’t a referee when you assigned me to the match. What did you expect?
I expected more than I got. I’d have been better off not having any referee for the match. My fault. I should be used to you wrestlers disappointing me.
Nope, not gonna’ let that one go by without a scathing reply. It took me a while to realize I was used but once I did, well I got so mad you could see smoke coming out of my ears.
Bullsh*t. You knew what would happen. You wanted it so you could make your next play and have it look like its my fault. You played all three of us.
Watch your tone Frank. I can just as easily strip you of that title for some violation of your contract. I’m sure the lawyers can find a loophole if I tell them to.
HA! Did you forget that I wrote my contract? I had a lawyer make sure any potential loopholes were removed before I signed it.
A momentary look of resignation. Lila was hoping I wouldn’t bring that up. I can see the wrinkles on her forehead getting deeper as she switches tactics.
That’s true. But you still better follow the party line. If not, I can always call Samuel Kendall and invite him out for lunch.
Enough! The camel’s back just broke under the weight of one straw too many.
I’ve been holding onto my trump card for a moment just like this. If Lila wants to play hardball, I’ll show her I can play too.
I pull out my new iPhone, scroll down the contacts list, and click on Sammy Kendall’s name. Lila looks shocked.
What are you doing?
Calling Sammy. No time like the present!
Now Lila is clearly confused. Good. It’s only going to get worse for her from here on out. I’m starting to enjoy this. Does that make me as bad as Drakz?
Hey Frank. What’s up?
Hi Sammy. You’re on speaker. Lila Sleater is here.
Lila continues to look befuddled. I’m sure she has no idea why I’m playing right into what she wants. Damn this is fun!
Hello Lila.
Samuel. How are you?
Better than you I expect. I’m guessing you just threatened to call me and arrange a lunch date. And on that lunch date you were going to let it drop, accidentally of course, that Frank wrestled in Legacy as El Tigre Blanco. You would do this thinking I’d get angry that Frank was wrestling while under a GFL contract.
Lila’s face turns white. Gotcha’ bitch!
I’ll take your silence as a yes. Let me save you some time and money. I would not be angry at Frank. You may know WFWF contracts but you don’t know GFL contracts. We don’t have a non-compete clause. I couldn’t sue Frank even if I wanted to… which I don’t!
Lila’s head snaps up from the phone to look me right in the eyes, her teeth grinding behind tightly pursed lips. It takes her a moment before she can speak again.
Well played Frank. Is there any further point to this or are you just enjoying embarrassing me.
Yes and yes. Care to fill her in Sammy?
Now for the really big surprise. Lila thinks wrestlers are big dumb jocks? Wrong. This one just outsmarted you in a major way.
With pleasure Frank. Lila, I don’t like how you do business, particularly when it comes to how you treat your wrestlers. Blackmail? Really? You act like you’re the smartest person in the room. You’re not!
Sammy pauses either for dramatic effect or maybe in the hopes that Lila will say something so he can cut her off and continue. Lila remains silent, looking more and more deflated with each word Sammy speaks.
Your threat is a completely empty one. Now the tables have turned. I’ve let Frank know that he can come back to the GFL any time he wants to for a top dollar contract and a guaranteed title fight.
Another pause, this time definitely for effect. He basically just turned Lila’s own blackmail scheme against her. This was his idea, one he came up with during our meeting a few months ago in Vegas. It was then that I realized the depth of his dislike for Lila. Hell, he may be enjoying this more than I am.
The WFWF made him a star. The GFL is more than happy to capitalize on that.
Now that had to sting! My turn to drive the point home extra hard, with facts that even Lila cannot deny.
I know you know full well that a top dollar GFL contract is much larger than a top dollar WFWF contract. I could make more for one PPV main event in the GFL than an entire year of wrestling matches in the WFWF.
Lila’s shoulders slump. She knows when she’s been beat.
So what’s keeping you from jumping ship now. It’s obvious you don’t like working for me.
I like professional wrestling more than I like MMA fighting. I want to be in the WFWF.
I pause long enough for her to see a crack of light before I slam the door in her face, figuratively speaking.
As long as it’s on MY terms. Now you have a choice. Keep me happy and I stick around as your International Champion bringing respect to the business. Piss me off again and it’s back to GFL. Right Sammy?
Please piss him off Lila. We’d really like to have Frank back. He’s just hitting his prime and would make a great GFL Champion.
That was a little extra flourish that tells me Sammy is getting a real kick out of turning the screws on Lila. She is speechless, crossing her arms and fuming silently.
Thanks Sammy. I think that’s all for now.
Happy to help out. Keep me on speed dial bud. We’re waiting for you to come home.
I end the call. Lila is still stewing but manages to speak through gritted teeth.
You son of a bitch.
Never thought I’d go to Sammy first, did you?
No I didn’t. So what do you want? How do I “keep you happy”?
Lila doesn’t have to make air quotes for me to hear them in her voice. It’s gonna’ take some time for her to get used to this change in roles. She’s not used to people telling her that she needs them more than they need her.
As for me, I’m feeling a million times better than when I dropped the bombshell that I signed myself to a no fine/suspend/fire me contract while I was GM for a day. I want to laugh in her face like some campy over the top movie villain but that might push her too far so I restrain myself.
I know what you are planning for SuperBrawl. I don’t mind but I want a special stipulation.
Which is?
If I have to repeat history, then let’s go all the way. I want a second chance to get it right. I want a ladder match.
Lila’s shock quickly turns into a big toothy grin. My request is certainly not what she expected but hey, I’m full of surprises today.
That’s it? All this grandstanding to ask me for a ladder match?
Yep. For now.
A ladder match certainly makes for a better SuperBrawl draw. You want it, you got it.
My turn to smile. Now all I have to do is explain to every single person in my camp why I just demanded a ladder match at SuperBrawl.
See? I’m not so hard to work with. I’m sure you’ll find that out in the months to come.
Or else you go back to Samuel’s welcoming arms?
Faster than you can say “Goodbye Frank”!
Lila gives me one last look of something I can’t quite figure out. Maybe anger, maybe disgust, maybe respect, who knows? What matters is I got myself and Daphne out from under her thumb. I can hear Daphne tapping away at her phone sending out angry tweets already.
Another benefit: maybe Scott won’t think I’m quite so boring.
Lila hurries out of the office, Abe just as quickly reappearing. He sees the smile on my face.
I take it the meeting went well?
Better than I ever expected. Now where’s that bottle of scotch you keep hidden in here? I need to make a toast.
Blinders
Finding myself about to face off with Billy Broom is not something I look forward to. Billy is one of the few people in the WFWF I call friend. He’s been to my home in Framingham to train with me. My wife likes him. My daughter likes him. Hell, my cat even likes him and Doctor Claw hates all humans who don’t regularly give him food and cat treats.
Fact is, I think Billy is a nice guy and I wish the best for him. The bond between us is only stronger now that I too have a daughter. Nobody was cheering for Billy louder than I when he took it to Needles for bringing Jenny into their business.
But in Las Vegas I will have to put on my blinders, ignore the friendship we have, and take it to him the same as I would against Ante Whitner or Tyler Draven.
Believe me when I say that is not as hard as you might think.
Humor me as I tell you all a story from my early days in the Guerrilla Fighting League.
My third match was against Robby Masters, a long time friend of mine from our time on the Boston College wrestling team and as roommates trying to make ends meet in our first year in the GFL. You could say we were each others ride or die as we tried to get our break in the fight game. Neither one of us wanted to face the other inside the octagon but the inevitable match came sooner than we expected.
Now the buildup to the fight had people worried. We didn’t have any bad things to say about the other. It was all praise upon praise at how much we respected the other and looked forward to putting on a good fight. The talking heads translated that as “They’re going to have a boring fight that is nothing more than a televised sparring match. Neither has the killer instinct to bring it to their friend. It’s going to end in a split decision that nobody cares about.”
Sure enough, fight night arrived and ours was the least anticipated match on the card. But what nobody understood is that I am a competitor first and foremost. I wanted to win and once I stepped inside the octagon, there were no thoughts of friendship in my head. I was obsessed with the burning desire to beat my opponent, who was now no more than another nameless, faceless enemy standing between me and my goals.
It’s hard to tell if Robby felt the same way once the fight started. Fact is, I came out too fast and hard for him, much to the surprise of all the pundits who thought the match would be an extended piss break. I put on the blinders to our friendship and knocked out my friend in under two minutes, earning the knockout of the night bonus.
It took a while after the fight for Robby to look me in the eye again. When he finally did, it was to admit that he wanted to knock me out in that fight but I was the better man. No hard feelings. Still friends to this day.
My message to Billy is this: don’t think our friendship will prevent me from coming out as “the lethal weapon” ready to use every bit of skill in my arsenal to put you down and leave the victor. True, I’d prefer it be Needles that eats the pin or submission but you can’t always pick who you beat in a triple threat match. It’s a coin flip as to whether Billy or Needles ends up in the Dasochoku.
It’s nothing personal. Winning means that damn much to me. The bell will ring, the blinders will go on, and you will become the enemy. You will be standing directly between me and my goals of a successful title defense at SuperBrawl. I need to get some positive momentum going into SuperBrawl, need to wash away the losses to Drakz and Zmey. That means you better get out of the way or I will put you to sleep. Its as simple as that.
I hope that afterwards we can still be friends.
Framingham, MA : Feb. 16, 2019
Back to Business as Usual
Another long day of training ends with Daphne going over all the things she saw that I could improve on. After she runs through her list, she gives me an odd look and shakes her head.
Not one complaint that I’m nitpicking? That’s not like you. It’s freaking me out. What’s the deal?
Have a seat while I tell you a story.
I pat the bench next to me. Daphne sits and stares at me, trying to get a read.
I’ve kept her in the dark long enough. Time to break the good news to her.
I tell Daphne how I broke Lila’s hold over us, being sure to include every detail including imitating all the different faces Lila made. When I’m done telling the tale, Daphne’s eyes light up as she realizes what it means.
Daphne is happy. Actually, that’s an understatement. She’s ecstatic. She runs around the gym hugging everybody, which is a total surprise to Sarah who is holding little Laura and trying to prevent her from being crushed by an exuberant Daphne. Daphne laughs like a crazy woman and screams “We’re free!” to the confusion of the half dozen other people in the gym.
Honestly, that’s how I’ve wanted to react ever since the meeting with Lila but as Scott would say, I’m boring. So I sit here on the bench waiting for Daphne to wear herself out celebrating for the both of us.
Finally she does and returns to the bench slightly out of breath.
This is f***ing awesome!
It certainly felt good.
Daphne takes a deep breath, trying to get serious, almost succeeding. Now that she knows why I’ve been in such a good mood, she is in a matching good mood.
You wouldn’t actually leave the WFWF, would you?
I don’t want to but every man has his breaking point. Lila knows how to push buttons so if it came down to it, yes, I’d go back to the GFL.
You’re kinda stuck, aren’t you? Do a job you like for a boss you hate or a job you hate for a boss you like?
It’s the story of the rock and a hard place, with me stuck in the middle.
Daphne, who knows me better than almost anyone else, senses that this isn’t the time or place for me to talk about actually leaving, not with SuperBrawl and my ultimate redemption looming so close on the horizon.
Kinda’ like this triple threat match, right?
Exactly like it. I want to have a technical match with Billy. He deserves that. But when it comes to Needles, he’s a slime ball and I may have to play dirty, stoop to his level, in order to win.
Another rock and a hard place. You can’t give both the type of match they deserve.
Doesn’t look like it. On the upside, Billy may want to hurt Needles more than I do. I just want to teach him a lesson that his ultra violent ways won’t get him very far. Billy may be out for blood because Needles won’t leave Jenny out of it.
Of course you’re too much of a fighter to step aside and let them rip each other apart, then sneak in for an easy win.
My manager knows me well. Watching Billy and Needles fight is not an option, as much fun as it may be. This is a triple threat match and as part of the “triple” I have to do my best to be part of the fight. To do any less would be disrespectful to my opponents and put me in a class with wrestlers like Drakz and Kyzer, who aren’t above taking the easy way out.
Nope. Not my style. Definitely not in keeping with the “fighting champion” moniker.
What will you do?
Start out with the technical stuff. Stick with it as long as I possibly can until Needles pushes too far. I can play rough too, you know. And whatever the outcome is, hope that Billy understands its just business in the ring. I don’t want to lose a friend over Lila’s random ass booking.
Friends are hard to come by in the business.
Indeed. A true friend is a rare find. Billy is one of those guys I’d like to hang out with outside of the business. I’m sure as Laura grows older he can provide me with lots of good parenting tips. I don’t know what scares me more: Tugarin Zmey or Laura as a teenager.
We get a good chuckle out of it. Daphne hangs around so much now that she is officially a member of the family: Auntie Daffie. I’m sure she’ll have an influence on Laura as she gets older, not so sure that is a good thing as I don’t want to raise a teenage Daphne. She had to be a major handful for her parents at that age… or any age come to think of it.
Why don’t you and Billy team up to take Needles out early, then you can have a technical one on one match with Billy to decide the winner?
Good in theory. In practice, these multi-man clusterf***s are hard to manage. You have to take your shots when you can.
If that’s the way you feel, why the hell did you ASK for a ladder match at SuperBrawl?
I sigh, dreading the moment I would have to explain it to Daphne. I’ve wavered on thinking it was a good idea now that I’ve had time to think about it but I made the bed. Now I have to sleep in it.
I guess I want the same thing Ante and Tyler want: redemption. Last SuperBrawl I was in a ladder match. I should have won it but thanks to LeeRoy Jenkins I ended up in the ropes looking up at Ante Whitner holding the Golden Opportunity briefcase.
I know. Ante likes to remind people of it whenever he gets the chance.
Maybe not every chance but he does bring it up fairly often. If Lila’s plan is as obvious as we all think it is, then I will get my chance to rewrite history. I’ll erase one embarrassing moment and finally justify my title reign, shutting up everyone who says I don’t deserve the title because of how I stole it from Brennan.
Personally, I think you should ignore the idiots who say that. You’ve defended the title against Mak Cross, Ante, and Tyler. It’s your title by right now. No asterisks.
Easier said than done. I’ve built my career on fighting fairly and earning my opportunities yet my greatest victory is a knee to the face of an already beaten man. A year later and it’s still a bitter pill to swallow.
I need to prove it… just one more time. A ladder match at SuperBrawl brings me back to where it all started. All I have to do is win this time. Does that make sense?
Perfect sense. It’s the same reason I have for going back to Legacy to get my Women’s title back… a title I NEVER lost. I could try to talk you out of it but what would be the point. We’re both on the same quest. Plus it’s too late now.
She giggles a little at the idea of us debating a moot point. Whats done is done. I’m prepared to live with the consequences. If I want my redemption, this is the only way to get it.
Indeed. I can hardly back out of a stipulation I demanded. I’m gonna’ take my lumps, climb that ladder, grab my belt, and get back my self respect.
I’ll be there to make sure you do.
It suddenly hits me how much Daphne has given up to be my manager. The world got a glimpse of the real Daphne in her feud with Mesh, a veteran wrestler wise to the ways of mind games and manipulation. Daphne keeps it under wraps while serving as my manager, choosing to act more like me in a show of support. It hasn’t been easy. My way isn’t always the same as Daphne’s way but she made the sacrifice for me.
Lila made it even worse when she tried to force Daphne to shut up and shake her ass. I think that had as much to do with Daphne going after Mesh as any desire to mold Mesh into Daphne’s idea of a proper female role model. She needed an outlet for all that bottled up frustration.
It’s good to have the old Daphne back, even if it does mean I’ll have to explain away several dozen inflammatory tweets and remind her that she is at ringside to give me instructions and support, not to interfere in my matches.
She’s not heavy. She’s my manager. And my friend.
Where would I be without Daphne?
That’s not a question I ever want to answer.
Thanks Daphne. For understanding. For everything.
Probably the most sentimental thing I’ve ever said to Daphne. Probably something I should have said much sooner.
Every idealist needs a realist to keep them grounded. That’s my Daphne.
With her at my side, I can do anything I set my mind to.
I’m Not Impressed
Well well well, look at what we have here. The newest sadistic son of a bitch on the block.
Ryan “Needles” Payne.
A poor man’s Phillip Schneider.
I’m not impressed.
Bring your bat. Bring your needles. Bring your “I’m a bad ass” attitude.
It won’t help.
You’re looking at the man who broke Trace Demon. Tyler Draven was picking up my sloppy seconds. I did the hard work beating Trace not once but twice inside the squared circle. I showed in those matches with the Demon that I could play with the big boys and I could win. I became one of the big boys of the WFWF.
I showed no fear.
If I didn’t fear Trace Demon, then why the hell would I ever fear you?
Sure, you have a few tricks but they’re quite frankly lame compared to the tricks I’ve seen others do.
A baseball bat? Big f***ing deal! I’ve seen a man’s hand impaled to the mat with a f***ing sword. I’ve seen a man’s brains splattered all over the mat by a barb wire wrapped baseball bat.
The needle? Big f***ing deal! I’ve seen two men step into a ring surrounded by burning barb wire and literally try to eviscerate each other. I watched as Billy and his crew had to clean up chunks of burnt flesh from the the ring.
You’re a God damn amateur at this psychotic ultra violence. I’ve done worse myself in my street fight against Mike Jette. Don’t confuse not wanting to fight like an animal with not being able to. If the moment calls for it, I can fight ugly too.
Now it’s no secret that I like Billy. I don’t want to hurt or embarrass him, just beat him.
I have absolutely no such good feelings towards you. I will take great pleasure in putting you to sleep… but only after I first show you just how bad of a wrestler you are by running circles around you. I’m gonna’ take you to school before I put you out.
Your bat, your needle, whatever weapons or dirty tactics you try will be no match for the technical skill of the Lethal Weapon. They won’t help you one bit as I have my way with you and then lock in the Dasochoku.
All this assumes that Billy doesn’t get his hands on you first. He is somebody you should be very worried about. He may still be carrying around a big ass chip on his shoulder because you dared to talk about his daughter. It may be in my best interest to stand back and let Billy kick your ass, then step in to pick up the scraps.
Don’t get your hopes up.
Anybody who knows me knows that won’t happen. It’s not in me to stand back and watch while Billy does all the hard work. I plan to beat both you AND Billy in this match, leaving no doubt that the International Champion is coming to Dallas ready for anything.
Welcome to the big time Needles. You’ve been thrown in the deep end with a shark named Frank Lynn, a very hungry shark who smells blood in the water. Don’t bother looking for a bigger boat either. There isn’t one big enough to save you from me.
After this is all over you’ll have to change your nickname from “Needles” to “Chum”.
Framingham, MA : Feb. 10, 2019
I almost missed Scott’s call.
I had to trade in my Nokia flip phone for a new iPhone and I’m still getting used to the generic ring tones. They all sound so lame compared to Led Zeppelin’s “Dazed and Confused” but I‘m not paying to re-download ringtones the tech guy couldn’t transfer. Not to mention that anybody who thinks these mini tablets are better than a flip phone never saw The Matrix or Star Trek. That clicking noise as it snaps open… the coolest. Swiping right to answer a call… no where near as satisfying. Gonna’ take a while to get used to the new phone.
I’m rambling. Point is I didn’t miss Scott’s call although soon enough I would wish I did.
Hey there Scott. What’s on your mind?
As my agent at Championship Connections, I’m pretty sure it’s something to do with money or PR. Good thing Scott’s around to take care of that crap for me because if left in my hands… well I might not have nearly as much money or good will with the fans.
I heard about your next match. I think it’s obvious where Lila is going with this.
No duh. Stevie Wonder can see it coming.
The less said about it for now the better. I sucked as a referee and Lila’s gonna’ make sure I pay a high price for it.
Aren’t you worried?
Not really. I can handle whatever Lila throws my way.
I hope so, for both our sakes.
Odd. I expected my agent to mirror my bravado but instead I’m getting a definite negative vibe from him. After all we’ve been through he’s losing faith now?
Why are you going all drama queen on me?
Because I’ve seen the numbers Frank. Did you know that La Pantera Negra merch outsold the Lethal Weapon merch almost three to one last month? And she was playing the bad guy! Bad guys aren’t supposed to outsell the good guys.
C’mon man. The La Pantera Negra shirt with the glow in the dark eyes… that was cool!
Whoever Daphne went to for her shirt design does better than whoever Scott hired to design my shirts. I’m wearing one of those glow in the dark La Pantera Negra shirts right now! But the decline in sales is my fault, not some lame ass shirt designer.
Maybe, maybe not. You’re missing the point.
How ‘bout you clear it up for me.
Daphne and others are outselling you because you’re too plain. You’re a single scoop of vanilla ice cream standing next to a bunch of banana splits with all the toppings.
What’s wrong with vanilla ice cream? I like it.
So?
Without the International Championship, without the revolution, there’s not much there to sell.
Gee thanks bud. Now that you have World Champion Penny Shannon on the payroll who needs boring International Champion Frank Lynn, eh?
This has nothing to do with Penny, although even you have to admit she is far from boring. Her merch is flying off the shelves. Compared to her, your stuff is collecting dust before a quick trip to the BOGO bargain bin.
I guess it wasn’t the eye patch. Whether she has one or two good eyes, she’s more interesting than me. Yay for Penny.
Fact is, I need you to have the belt if I’m going to keep marketing you. Being the fighting champion is all we have going right now.
So this is your way of boosting my confidence, making sure I keep the belt even in light of what Lila clearly has planned.
Yes. You cannot lose that belt!
I do believe all five and half feet, one hundred fifty pounds when soaking wet, suit wearing nerd Scott just tried to lay down the law on me! Oh how I wish he were here in person so I could show him just how ready I am to defend my title… and my honor.
It’s all crystal clear now. I’m only useful to him if I have something to sell. The “revolution” worked for six months. The “fighting champion” worked for the past year. But this little piss ant is telling me that without the revolution or the belt I’m worthless to him.
Ungrateful jackass.
Well it’s not working. It’s pissing me off. I train hard, I fight hard, I win. If that isn’t enough for you to market then perhaps I should have a talk with Josh? Ask for a new agent who doesn’t find me so boring.
Aw sh*t Frank. I’m sorry. This isn’t coming off how I wanted it.
No it isn’t. Maybe you should hang up and form a new plan that doesn’t include making the current WFWF International Champion want to ram his fist down your throat.
I can hear the audible *gulp* as Scott realizes I’m not joking. I really do want to rearrange his face into a Picasso painting right now.
Yeah… I guess I should. Just do one thing for me. Don’t let Lila put you in a position where it’s impossible for you to successfully defend your title. Don’t let her screw you.
I don’t think she swings that way.
Huh?
Never mind. Talk to you later.
I don’t give him the chance to reply.
I don’t know what bothers me more: that he came out and told me to my face I’m boring or that deep down I know he may have a point. I’ve let Lila clip my wings for too long with her blackmail scheme. I have a trump card. I should use it.
WFWF Sin City Showdown RP
Stuck in the Middle
featuring Frank Lynn
Boston, MA : Feb. 12, 2019
The Smartest Person in the Room
Time for my monthly visit to the Legacy offices to discuss business matters with Abraham. Funny how much work I end up doing as a “silent partner”. Pretty obvious Abe is grooming me to one day take over. Question is how soon will that day be. He’s no spring chicken and two decades of boxing may have shortened what golden years he will get to enjoy.
As I walk up the stairs to his office, I can hear a meeting through the slightly open door. It’s Abe, the Dixons, and somebody else, someone speaking too low for their voice to carry.
From what I do hear, it’s obvious someone is trying to sign the Dixons away from Legacy and they’re having none of it. Eli speaks for the brothers rather loudly, pointing out that they are a tag team, why would they go to a company that has no tag division.
Then all three Dixons come storming out of the office, almost knocking me over. A few mumbled “sorry” and “excuse me” later and they are past me heading towards the training area laughing about the offer.
I dip my head into the office and see Abe behind the desk.
Everything okay Abe?
Everything’s fine Frank. We’re just wrapping up here.
That’s when the quiet figure in one of the guest chairs spins around. Goddamnit! It’s Lila f’n Sleater, somehow still looking smug despite the Dixons just turning down an offer to come to the WFWF.
Hello Frank.
Lila.
That’s all she’s getting from me. A cold acknowledgement of her presence and a nod of my head that I can’t stop myself from doing. My mother’s lessons in good manners are hard to forget, even in the presence of the wicked witch of the west.
Lila’s been scouting the Legacy talent, hoping to sign some new faces to debut after SuperBrawl.
I’m sorry Daphne turned down our offer. She did quite well against Mesh. I’m also sorry that the Dixons are set on staying in Legacy. Daryl in particular could be a big star in the WFWF but family bonds and a love of tag team wrestling… well, this time I struck out.
Her overall demeanor is that of a polite business woman but her eyes burn at me, as if I’m to blame for Daphne and the Dixons turning down her offers.
That’s too bad. You’re losing out on some really talented wrestlers. But it’s nothing Daphne or I said. We’d actually love to see more people from Legacy make the jump.
Why don’t I believe that?
At this point I realize Lila wants to hash something out, something that I’d rather Abe not be a part of.
Abe, you mind if we use your office for a few minutes? We need to have a private conversation.
Without a word, Abe nods his head knowingly and quickly departs his office closing the door behind him, leaving me and Lila alone.
Shall we take the gloves off?
By all means. There’s nothing I love more than witty banter with my wrestlers.
Actually, I have to sympathize a little with her. She’s had to deal with people like Trace Demon, Drakz, Kyzer, two generations of Ahrimans, and so on for years. No wonder she’s turned into a total bitch. But that doesn’t mean I’ll be her whipping boy.
You’re trying to f*** me over, aren’t you? A triple threat against Billy and Needles? We all know what that is actually about.
She does me the honor of not looking at me like a stupid child who just asked to eat cake for breakfast.
Are you going to cry foul play? You’re the one who couldn’t call the match and left me with no clear number one contender.
You knew I wasn’t a referee when you assigned me to the match. What did you expect?
I expected more than I got. I’d have been better off not having any referee for the match. My fault. I should be used to you wrestlers disappointing me.
Nope, not gonna’ let that one go by without a scathing reply. It took me a while to realize I was used but once I did, well I got so mad you could see smoke coming out of my ears.
Bullsh*t. You knew what would happen. You wanted it so you could make your next play and have it look like its my fault. You played all three of us.
Watch your tone Frank. I can just as easily strip you of that title for some violation of your contract. I’m sure the lawyers can find a loophole if I tell them to.
HA! Did you forget that I wrote my contract? I had a lawyer make sure any potential loopholes were removed before I signed it.
A momentary look of resignation. Lila was hoping I wouldn’t bring that up. I can see the wrinkles on her forehead getting deeper as she switches tactics.
That’s true. But you still better follow the party line. If not, I can always call Samuel Kendall and invite him out for lunch.
Enough! The camel’s back just broke under the weight of one straw too many.
I’ve been holding onto my trump card for a moment just like this. If Lila wants to play hardball, I’ll show her I can play too.
I pull out my new iPhone, scroll down the contacts list, and click on Sammy Kendall’s name. Lila looks shocked.
What are you doing?
Calling Sammy. No time like the present!
Now Lila is clearly confused. Good. It’s only going to get worse for her from here on out. I’m starting to enjoy this. Does that make me as bad as Drakz?
Hey Frank. What’s up?
Hi Sammy. You’re on speaker. Lila Sleater is here.
Lila continues to look befuddled. I’m sure she has no idea why I’m playing right into what she wants. Damn this is fun!
Hello Lila.
Samuel. How are you?
Better than you I expect. I’m guessing you just threatened to call me and arrange a lunch date. And on that lunch date you were going to let it drop, accidentally of course, that Frank wrestled in Legacy as El Tigre Blanco. You would do this thinking I’d get angry that Frank was wrestling while under a GFL contract.
Lila’s face turns white. Gotcha’ bitch!
I’ll take your silence as a yes. Let me save you some time and money. I would not be angry at Frank. You may know WFWF contracts but you don’t know GFL contracts. We don’t have a non-compete clause. I couldn’t sue Frank even if I wanted to… which I don’t!
Lila’s head snaps up from the phone to look me right in the eyes, her teeth grinding behind tightly pursed lips. It takes her a moment before she can speak again.
Well played Frank. Is there any further point to this or are you just enjoying embarrassing me.
Yes and yes. Care to fill her in Sammy?
Now for the really big surprise. Lila thinks wrestlers are big dumb jocks? Wrong. This one just outsmarted you in a major way.
With pleasure Frank. Lila, I don’t like how you do business, particularly when it comes to how you treat your wrestlers. Blackmail? Really? You act like you’re the smartest person in the room. You’re not!
Sammy pauses either for dramatic effect or maybe in the hopes that Lila will say something so he can cut her off and continue. Lila remains silent, looking more and more deflated with each word Sammy speaks.
Your threat is a completely empty one. Now the tables have turned. I’ve let Frank know that he can come back to the GFL any time he wants to for a top dollar contract and a guaranteed title fight.
Another pause, this time definitely for effect. He basically just turned Lila’s own blackmail scheme against her. This was his idea, one he came up with during our meeting a few months ago in Vegas. It was then that I realized the depth of his dislike for Lila. Hell, he may be enjoying this more than I am.
The WFWF made him a star. The GFL is more than happy to capitalize on that.
Now that had to sting! My turn to drive the point home extra hard, with facts that even Lila cannot deny.
I know you know full well that a top dollar GFL contract is much larger than a top dollar WFWF contract. I could make more for one PPV main event in the GFL than an entire year of wrestling matches in the WFWF.
Lila’s shoulders slump. She knows when she’s been beat.
So what’s keeping you from jumping ship now. It’s obvious you don’t like working for me.
I like professional wrestling more than I like MMA fighting. I want to be in the WFWF.
I pause long enough for her to see a crack of light before I slam the door in her face, figuratively speaking.
As long as it’s on MY terms. Now you have a choice. Keep me happy and I stick around as your International Champion bringing respect to the business. Piss me off again and it’s back to GFL. Right Sammy?
Please piss him off Lila. We’d really like to have Frank back. He’s just hitting his prime and would make a great GFL Champion.
That was a little extra flourish that tells me Sammy is getting a real kick out of turning the screws on Lila. She is speechless, crossing her arms and fuming silently.
Thanks Sammy. I think that’s all for now.
Happy to help out. Keep me on speed dial bud. We’re waiting for you to come home.
I end the call. Lila is still stewing but manages to speak through gritted teeth.
You son of a bitch.
Never thought I’d go to Sammy first, did you?
No I didn’t. So what do you want? How do I “keep you happy”?
Lila doesn’t have to make air quotes for me to hear them in her voice. It’s gonna’ take some time for her to get used to this change in roles. She’s not used to people telling her that she needs them more than they need her.
As for me, I’m feeling a million times better than when I dropped the bombshell that I signed myself to a no fine/suspend/fire me contract while I was GM for a day. I want to laugh in her face like some campy over the top movie villain but that might push her too far so I restrain myself.
I know what you are planning for SuperBrawl. I don’t mind but I want a special stipulation.
Which is?
If I have to repeat history, then let’s go all the way. I want a second chance to get it right. I want a ladder match.
Lila’s shock quickly turns into a big toothy grin. My request is certainly not what she expected but hey, I’m full of surprises today.
That’s it? All this grandstanding to ask me for a ladder match?
Yep. For now.
A ladder match certainly makes for a better SuperBrawl draw. You want it, you got it.
My turn to smile. Now all I have to do is explain to every single person in my camp why I just demanded a ladder match at SuperBrawl.
See? I’m not so hard to work with. I’m sure you’ll find that out in the months to come.
Or else you go back to Samuel’s welcoming arms?
Faster than you can say “Goodbye Frank”!
Lila gives me one last look of something I can’t quite figure out. Maybe anger, maybe disgust, maybe respect, who knows? What matters is I got myself and Daphne out from under her thumb. I can hear Daphne tapping away at her phone sending out angry tweets already.
Another benefit: maybe Scott won’t think I’m quite so boring.
Lila hurries out of the office, Abe just as quickly reappearing. He sees the smile on my face.
I take it the meeting went well?
Better than I ever expected. Now where’s that bottle of scotch you keep hidden in here? I need to make a toast.
Blinders
Finding myself about to face off with Billy Broom is not something I look forward to. Billy is one of the few people in the WFWF I call friend. He’s been to my home in Framingham to train with me. My wife likes him. My daughter likes him. Hell, my cat even likes him and Doctor Claw hates all humans who don’t regularly give him food and cat treats.
Fact is, I think Billy is a nice guy and I wish the best for him. The bond between us is only stronger now that I too have a daughter. Nobody was cheering for Billy louder than I when he took it to Needles for bringing Jenny into their business.
But in Las Vegas I will have to put on my blinders, ignore the friendship we have, and take it to him the same as I would against Ante Whitner or Tyler Draven.
Believe me when I say that is not as hard as you might think.
Humor me as I tell you all a story from my early days in the Guerrilla Fighting League.
My third match was against Robby Masters, a long time friend of mine from our time on the Boston College wrestling team and as roommates trying to make ends meet in our first year in the GFL. You could say we were each others ride or die as we tried to get our break in the fight game. Neither one of us wanted to face the other inside the octagon but the inevitable match came sooner than we expected.
Now the buildup to the fight had people worried. We didn’t have any bad things to say about the other. It was all praise upon praise at how much we respected the other and looked forward to putting on a good fight. The talking heads translated that as “They’re going to have a boring fight that is nothing more than a televised sparring match. Neither has the killer instinct to bring it to their friend. It’s going to end in a split decision that nobody cares about.”
Sure enough, fight night arrived and ours was the least anticipated match on the card. But what nobody understood is that I am a competitor first and foremost. I wanted to win and once I stepped inside the octagon, there were no thoughts of friendship in my head. I was obsessed with the burning desire to beat my opponent, who was now no more than another nameless, faceless enemy standing between me and my goals.
It’s hard to tell if Robby felt the same way once the fight started. Fact is, I came out too fast and hard for him, much to the surprise of all the pundits who thought the match would be an extended piss break. I put on the blinders to our friendship and knocked out my friend in under two minutes, earning the knockout of the night bonus.
It took a while after the fight for Robby to look me in the eye again. When he finally did, it was to admit that he wanted to knock me out in that fight but I was the better man. No hard feelings. Still friends to this day.
My message to Billy is this: don’t think our friendship will prevent me from coming out as “the lethal weapon” ready to use every bit of skill in my arsenal to put you down and leave the victor. True, I’d prefer it be Needles that eats the pin or submission but you can’t always pick who you beat in a triple threat match. It’s a coin flip as to whether Billy or Needles ends up in the Dasochoku.
It’s nothing personal. Winning means that damn much to me. The bell will ring, the blinders will go on, and you will become the enemy. You will be standing directly between me and my goals of a successful title defense at SuperBrawl. I need to get some positive momentum going into SuperBrawl, need to wash away the losses to Drakz and Zmey. That means you better get out of the way or I will put you to sleep. Its as simple as that.
I hope that afterwards we can still be friends.
Framingham, MA : Feb. 16, 2019
Back to Business as Usual
Another long day of training ends with Daphne going over all the things she saw that I could improve on. After she runs through her list, she gives me an odd look and shakes her head.
Not one complaint that I’m nitpicking? That’s not like you. It’s freaking me out. What’s the deal?
Have a seat while I tell you a story.
I pat the bench next to me. Daphne sits and stares at me, trying to get a read.
I’ve kept her in the dark long enough. Time to break the good news to her.
I tell Daphne how I broke Lila’s hold over us, being sure to include every detail including imitating all the different faces Lila made. When I’m done telling the tale, Daphne’s eyes light up as she realizes what it means.
Daphne is happy. Actually, that’s an understatement. She’s ecstatic. She runs around the gym hugging everybody, which is a total surprise to Sarah who is holding little Laura and trying to prevent her from being crushed by an exuberant Daphne. Daphne laughs like a crazy woman and screams “We’re free!” to the confusion of the half dozen other people in the gym.
Honestly, that’s how I’ve wanted to react ever since the meeting with Lila but as Scott would say, I’m boring. So I sit here on the bench waiting for Daphne to wear herself out celebrating for the both of us.
Finally she does and returns to the bench slightly out of breath.
This is f***ing awesome!
It certainly felt good.
Daphne takes a deep breath, trying to get serious, almost succeeding. Now that she knows why I’ve been in such a good mood, she is in a matching good mood.
You wouldn’t actually leave the WFWF, would you?
I don’t want to but every man has his breaking point. Lila knows how to push buttons so if it came down to it, yes, I’d go back to the GFL.
You’re kinda stuck, aren’t you? Do a job you like for a boss you hate or a job you hate for a boss you like?
It’s the story of the rock and a hard place, with me stuck in the middle.
Daphne, who knows me better than almost anyone else, senses that this isn’t the time or place for me to talk about actually leaving, not with SuperBrawl and my ultimate redemption looming so close on the horizon.
Kinda’ like this triple threat match, right?
Exactly like it. I want to have a technical match with Billy. He deserves that. But when it comes to Needles, he’s a slime ball and I may have to play dirty, stoop to his level, in order to win.
Another rock and a hard place. You can’t give both the type of match they deserve.
Doesn’t look like it. On the upside, Billy may want to hurt Needles more than I do. I just want to teach him a lesson that his ultra violent ways won’t get him very far. Billy may be out for blood because Needles won’t leave Jenny out of it.
Of course you’re too much of a fighter to step aside and let them rip each other apart, then sneak in for an easy win.
My manager knows me well. Watching Billy and Needles fight is not an option, as much fun as it may be. This is a triple threat match and as part of the “triple” I have to do my best to be part of the fight. To do any less would be disrespectful to my opponents and put me in a class with wrestlers like Drakz and Kyzer, who aren’t above taking the easy way out.
Nope. Not my style. Definitely not in keeping with the “fighting champion” moniker.
What will you do?
Start out with the technical stuff. Stick with it as long as I possibly can until Needles pushes too far. I can play rough too, you know. And whatever the outcome is, hope that Billy understands its just business in the ring. I don’t want to lose a friend over Lila’s random ass booking.
Friends are hard to come by in the business.
Indeed. A true friend is a rare find. Billy is one of those guys I’d like to hang out with outside of the business. I’m sure as Laura grows older he can provide me with lots of good parenting tips. I don’t know what scares me more: Tugarin Zmey or Laura as a teenager.
We get a good chuckle out of it. Daphne hangs around so much now that she is officially a member of the family: Auntie Daffie. I’m sure she’ll have an influence on Laura as she gets older, not so sure that is a good thing as I don’t want to raise a teenage Daphne. She had to be a major handful for her parents at that age… or any age come to think of it.
Why don’t you and Billy team up to take Needles out early, then you can have a technical one on one match with Billy to decide the winner?
Good in theory. In practice, these multi-man clusterf***s are hard to manage. You have to take your shots when you can.
If that’s the way you feel, why the hell did you ASK for a ladder match at SuperBrawl?
I sigh, dreading the moment I would have to explain it to Daphne. I’ve wavered on thinking it was a good idea now that I’ve had time to think about it but I made the bed. Now I have to sleep in it.
I guess I want the same thing Ante and Tyler want: redemption. Last SuperBrawl I was in a ladder match. I should have won it but thanks to LeeRoy Jenkins I ended up in the ropes looking up at Ante Whitner holding the Golden Opportunity briefcase.
I know. Ante likes to remind people of it whenever he gets the chance.
Maybe not every chance but he does bring it up fairly often. If Lila’s plan is as obvious as we all think it is, then I will get my chance to rewrite history. I’ll erase one embarrassing moment and finally justify my title reign, shutting up everyone who says I don’t deserve the title because of how I stole it from Brennan.
Personally, I think you should ignore the idiots who say that. You’ve defended the title against Mak Cross, Ante, and Tyler. It’s your title by right now. No asterisks.
Easier said than done. I’ve built my career on fighting fairly and earning my opportunities yet my greatest victory is a knee to the face of an already beaten man. A year later and it’s still a bitter pill to swallow.
I need to prove it… just one more time. A ladder match at SuperBrawl brings me back to where it all started. All I have to do is win this time. Does that make sense?
Perfect sense. It’s the same reason I have for going back to Legacy to get my Women’s title back… a title I NEVER lost. I could try to talk you out of it but what would be the point. We’re both on the same quest. Plus it’s too late now.
She giggles a little at the idea of us debating a moot point. Whats done is done. I’m prepared to live with the consequences. If I want my redemption, this is the only way to get it.
Indeed. I can hardly back out of a stipulation I demanded. I’m gonna’ take my lumps, climb that ladder, grab my belt, and get back my self respect.
I’ll be there to make sure you do.
It suddenly hits me how much Daphne has given up to be my manager. The world got a glimpse of the real Daphne in her feud with Mesh, a veteran wrestler wise to the ways of mind games and manipulation. Daphne keeps it under wraps while serving as my manager, choosing to act more like me in a show of support. It hasn’t been easy. My way isn’t always the same as Daphne’s way but she made the sacrifice for me.
Lila made it even worse when she tried to force Daphne to shut up and shake her ass. I think that had as much to do with Daphne going after Mesh as any desire to mold Mesh into Daphne’s idea of a proper female role model. She needed an outlet for all that bottled up frustration.
It’s good to have the old Daphne back, even if it does mean I’ll have to explain away several dozen inflammatory tweets and remind her that she is at ringside to give me instructions and support, not to interfere in my matches.
She’s not heavy. She’s my manager. And my friend.
Where would I be without Daphne?
That’s not a question I ever want to answer.
Thanks Daphne. For understanding. For everything.
Probably the most sentimental thing I’ve ever said to Daphne. Probably something I should have said much sooner.
Every idealist needs a realist to keep them grounded. That’s my Daphne.
With her at my side, I can do anything I set my mind to.
I’m Not Impressed
Well well well, look at what we have here. The newest sadistic son of a bitch on the block.
Ryan “Needles” Payne.
A poor man’s Phillip Schneider.
I’m not impressed.
Bring your bat. Bring your needles. Bring your “I’m a bad ass” attitude.
It won’t help.
You’re looking at the man who broke Trace Demon. Tyler Draven was picking up my sloppy seconds. I did the hard work beating Trace not once but twice inside the squared circle. I showed in those matches with the Demon that I could play with the big boys and I could win. I became one of the big boys of the WFWF.
I showed no fear.
If I didn’t fear Trace Demon, then why the hell would I ever fear you?
Sure, you have a few tricks but they’re quite frankly lame compared to the tricks I’ve seen others do.
A baseball bat? Big f***ing deal! I’ve seen a man’s hand impaled to the mat with a f***ing sword. I’ve seen a man’s brains splattered all over the mat by a barb wire wrapped baseball bat.
The needle? Big f***ing deal! I’ve seen two men step into a ring surrounded by burning barb wire and literally try to eviscerate each other. I watched as Billy and his crew had to clean up chunks of burnt flesh from the the ring.
You’re a God damn amateur at this psychotic ultra violence. I’ve done worse myself in my street fight against Mike Jette. Don’t confuse not wanting to fight like an animal with not being able to. If the moment calls for it, I can fight ugly too.
Now it’s no secret that I like Billy. I don’t want to hurt or embarrass him, just beat him.
I have absolutely no such good feelings towards you. I will take great pleasure in putting you to sleep… but only after I first show you just how bad of a wrestler you are by running circles around you. I’m gonna’ take you to school before I put you out.
Your bat, your needle, whatever weapons or dirty tactics you try will be no match for the technical skill of the Lethal Weapon. They won’t help you one bit as I have my way with you and then lock in the Dasochoku.
All this assumes that Billy doesn’t get his hands on you first. He is somebody you should be very worried about. He may still be carrying around a big ass chip on his shoulder because you dared to talk about his daughter. It may be in my best interest to stand back and let Billy kick your ass, then step in to pick up the scraps.
Don’t get your hopes up.
Anybody who knows me knows that won’t happen. It’s not in me to stand back and watch while Billy does all the hard work. I plan to beat both you AND Billy in this match, leaving no doubt that the International Champion is coming to Dallas ready for anything.
Welcome to the big time Needles. You’ve been thrown in the deep end with a shark named Frank Lynn, a very hungry shark who smells blood in the water. Don’t bother looking for a bigger boat either. There isn’t one big enough to save you from me.
After this is all over you’ll have to change your nickname from “Needles” to “Chum”.