Post by CBT on Oct 19, 2007 22:57:51 GMT -5
The Necessity for the Destruction of EBR
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
We were born to make manifest the glory of god that is within us.
And as we let our own light shine.
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same"
__________________
The world needs change, such an innocent and naive statement. Yet one of those rare remarks that doesn't just fall into the category of an opinion, but an underlined fact, as well.
There's no emphasis needed on how every one chooses their own path, the true beauty is in the bliss. The only reward is in doing what speaks volumes for your own survival, in a caste less existence you live.
The first mistake you'll ever make in your life is not eating the inedible. Or taking a face-dive in the process of achieving your first steps. Oh no. Your first mistake comes when you have your innocence taken away from you and you're forced to react in ways undreamt.
While it happens to the best of us, no two cases are the same. Sure it's nothing to dread, by now you've moved on after briefly assuring yourself no one saw it. But it happened and from that point on forward your way of life will never be the same again.
That brings us to the present, to an individual that knows that thesis on life all to well.
A champion, Tha CBT, whose boarding a plane.
Nothing wrong with that, however it's an international passage and he has asked for the chance to speak uninterrupted to any one willing to listen, in a much needed phatic speech.
CBT: I don't even know where to begin, for now Mia, just listen... ok?
MP: Alright?
CBT: I'm one of the most open individuals you'll ever find. I can bullshit you to no end. But overall, I give my honest to god thoughts on a silver platter even if the dish is more appealing than the entree.
But that's beside the point, because I look at past mistakes, and I quickly realize. I'm not doing anything constructive, I'm not creating anything worth a damn.
I'm still young, but there's no denying that I'm "getting older" and so as time goes by anything I do is more or less of the same.
I don't address things that bother me, however all to often I give the people that at times resent me, every reason to think less of me.
I take a long look in the mirror at who I am, and what is being said about me. I can't even begin to express that in words and therefor I continue to become the rubiks cube that's already been solved.
I'm well aware that right now I should be preparing for my match, but I felt the need to take a trip.
I'm bringing Mia with me, not just as a conversation piece, but as a witness. To the true me.
Something many can't begin to embrace, but disparted with having any other choice but too.
_______________________
Like quick sand, I struggle to pull myself back up to a prominent stance, and it only does good to pull me in deeper.
I get attacked left and right for not paying mind to the events that transpire in front of me. Mainly and only because I don't care.
You think I sit online all day waiting for my name to be dropped? Or to come across a less than failed attempt at humor, in regards to my stance as a champion?
I don't live for such petty rabelais. I got real things to concern myself with, and it all begins with a little plane trip.
For those of you unaware, I am Lebanese. Or as you all like to refer to my people, an A'Rab. No CBT isn't looking to gain some heat and go all anti-xenophobic. It's a part of me, and one I'm very proud of. But no emphasis needs to be paid in mind to that.
You see, back around a year or so ago, I made my first trip to Beirut. With a budgetable income, I earned the right to put some money aside, and spend on something any other career might not put in front of me.
I went there really to get away, peace at mind, nothing really to be concerned with. Not to dissolute the reality that is a somber state. But I felt the need to see what essentially is a part of me.
Flash forward to present day, and not much has changed, but apparently hindsight is 20/20. I couldn't be more on with my analogy, because leaving the U.S. apparently isn't just leaving the country. It's committing treason or unpatriotic. It's also not very wise to wear a shirt that shows you're "one of them."
I dunno, a victim of circumstance I was, and for the first time in my life I couldn't even defend myself with words.
All of this means nothing, but my point is that something changed inside of me. I haven't quite decoded it in it's entirety, but it's gotta be for the better.
I got tapped on my shoulder shortly after as I boarded the plane, quickly being informed of the writing on my shirt says, "Hezbollah are the winners."
I have a new found respect, in what I respect.
___________________
Those who throw stones, don't care where they land, so long as they damage something. Much like a bomb, no matter where you stand on politics, no explanation can be given on the body count of innocent civilians.
It was once said, live by your country, you die by your country. But how often are you side by side with your own worst enemy. To a degree where death is the only resolution, and a white flag is an insinuation to attack harder, with no recourse.
Lebanon is a beautiful country; God's country.
But because of religion, you see them as inefficient, misguided, and not fully conscious of their own wrong doing.
Even worse is that is your view of them in their own environment, in your surroundings they are terrorists or up to no good. Not to intensify whether the matter of debate or deem it as be an opinion or a fact. It's just the first impression, that is all, and that's the way it will always be.
The man indeed in search of a spiritual cleansing, not for release, but angst has arrived along with his confidant. The strangest thing is his ranting and raving after surveying the scenery he had no time to see on his previous trip.
Mia Porter does her best to calm him down, but quickly she seen as an outcaste, in how she portrays her self as some one to be seen and heard, how foolish, but she'll soon learn.
MP: What exactly are we doing here Mark? I mean a few days ago you seemed excited about facing this Johnny guy, and than you tell me to pack my bag for a much needed get away?
CBT: Listen, Mia. I love the support you give me. Being able to confide in some one makes it seem as though I can and will do, with no question. But honestly, there's some things you're gonna need to learn quickly...
MP: Like what?
CBT: Like for instance, you coming here and showing your face, that's a luxury. You take that for grant it, but I could slap you, and nobody would say a damn word. Maybe they'd even cheer me on. Point being, you are here for the ride. Nothing less and nothing more. If you disrespect me in any way, you can find a way back to the states. Got it?
MP: I don't like this side of you, but I get that women are seen in a different light. That doesn't mean you gotta get all wife beater on me, but I'll respect the fact this trip is for you to reap the benefit.
CBT: Thank you and I'm sorry, far be it for me to take the stress out on you. But this is the first step in turning the page on a glorified slump.
: Excuse me sir?
The voice sounds familiar, and quickly CBT revisits his time on the plane. Almost foreshadowing the all familiar tap...
: Excuse me. I noticed while talking to you on the plane, you seem to be, how you say... Americanized? Anyways, sir, my name is Taim Allah. You don't seem to be familiar with Arabic.
CBT: Why d you say that, Mr Taim?
T'Allah: Because, for one, you seemed to not know what was worded on your shirt.
CBT: Well I kind of got it because it seemed authentic...
T'Allah: Did you buy in Beirut?
CBT: No in the United St...
T'Allah: It's not authentic. While it's a strong symbol, of both good and evil in the Muslim world. It's made in America, for profit, and thought less of by the makers than you do. But don't take my words to heart, kind sir.
CBT: Call me Mark, Taim. Believe it or not, I probably knew the translation, just been dropped on my head so much that I forgot it and only remember Farsi.
T'Allah: I see, well Mark, I'd like to talk to you about that shirt a little more. But first, who is the female that you traveled with, if you don't mind my asking?
CBT: Not at all, this is Mia Porter, she's not of Arabic descent. But she is a close friend, and not one of the reasons for me traveling here.
T'Allah: Well then, why did you come all this way? I assume to see what is Lebanon. But as I said, you will quickly be a target of praise and anger. You do know what is Hezbollah, I assume?
CBT: Not really, a sports team?
T'Allah: No. Not at all, You see what I was referring to about the mixed reaction you will get, here in not just Beirut but Lebanon as whole.
Hezbollah is what you would call militant soldiers. They fight for a cause, but to them it is for benefit, not for settlement. They have no attachment only pride in if they win or lose.
CBT: Alright, but where's the concern?
T'Allah: Well essentially, there should be none. As they are a political party, no different then that of a Democrat. They have a huge role in taking care of the people of Lebanon. However as a representative to the Shiites, they often time are the source of trouble.
CBT: Heh, well this little history lesson is all well and good, but it seems rather pointless to be telling me all this.
T'Allah: No sir, every thing in life, serves point. Good or bad, by design, there's meaning behind everything.
Like for instance, me meeting you. I was gonna introduce myself, but I was overcome by how you, a man who has Arabic features, but nothing to the extent of being targeted would be stopped over a t-shirt.
I'm familiar with you as a wrestler, but I wondered why more so you would walk away from such disrespect.
CBT: Well to be fair I didn't know what about the shirt, was such a concern.
T'Allah: I'm not talking about the shirt. I explained to you how a big part of your culture is run, and you pay no mind. Even as a wrestler, now more than ever, you're passive aggressive. You have no mind to look at things and confront them.
CBT: That's not true!
T'Allah: Quiet! You listened to me when I told you what your shirt said, and the only reason I told you was for you to respond in kind.
I didn't spend my first 20 minutes back in Beirut to be your tour guide.
I'm trying to help you in this so called journey. To bring the repugnance back. So you don't continue to be disrespected and veered, but rather respected and feared.
CBT: So what you just go from my nice, Taim Allah, to Kamikaze Ken?
T'Allah: Forget it, I didn't expect a race traitor to get it...
Quickly CBT grabs the condescending man by his collar, reaching his free arm as far back as humanly possible so when he lets go it'll leave a nice mark. Both based on the impact and the ring conveniently placed on the middle finger.
CBT: I oughta knock your ass out. But I won't, and you know why?
T'Allah: No. Tell me?
CBT: Because you're the person with the balls to look me eye to eye, and show me the reflection I haven't seen in months.
T'Allah: Well then, that brings me back to our earlier discussion. Do you understand the point I was trying to make?
CBT: I think so. That your actions, good or bad, will nonetheless get you where you've got to go.
T'Allah: No, not quite.
CBT: Than, I guess the common bond is, the bad guy gets more done than the good guy. He gets the notoriety, all the while achieving the goals, and still doing some good with out skipping a beat?
T'Allah: Exactly.
CBT: So while Mia's not distracting us, tell me more about these boys.
A real party of god, if you ask me.
__________________
You know what I regret? Nothing.
If I ever had a complaint about my way of living, it is that I get so easily distracted, I forget to make my move and cancel out everything that happens while I laid low.
Things like teaming with the one and only, EBR. While a good idea, at first. I've had my doubts.
I'll still take championship gold, at any cost, like someone before me said.. I'm a belt mark.
You don't have to like what you're doing in order to relish what you gain from doing it.
A guy like EBR needs me more than I need him, and I'll happily continue to aide him in his quest for continued success. But what eats him up, at least in my eyes, is that in our time spent together he has done nothing to help or hurt Tha CBT. That itself makes him inferior to me.
See I've given him success, without me there would be no tag team title. Hell there would be no opportunity, how quick we forget when our friends are in high places.
Oh I'll lay off him as a target, he's off my radar, for now... but soon, without the virtue of a rematch, we will cross paths, and I assure you, we will.
I won't attack him mid-match for the benefit of getting in his head, that's child's play.
Leave me to be the one that stands idly by, watching and awaiting his first of many failures. They will come, and soon he will be gone.
It's not even a falsehood, for pleasantry, but a necessity. A must.
The likes of Obo are not safe, either. I've always fancied myself as the kid with a short temper, you know who gets beat up by the big ogre of a bully, but one day just can't take it. One day he just snaps, and the bully untimely finds out how unbelievably stupid he was for torturing the kid when he could have just moved on and nourished the pride he had won.
It's all on the rebound now, no more henry jekyll, say hello to edward hyde.
The start of something beautiful will begin with some thing, or some one who should honestly see his name left off of cards when I'm through with him.
I mean, seriously. A greaser? Is this 1950's greaser or the rehash, 1970's trend happy greaser? Either way, I see this guy as nothing short of a poser.
Nothing he can say or do with get him respect he has not earned, and he has the nerve to bring up beating Obo... fuck you kid.
I will not lie, you've got a hell of an upside. But unfortunately that's all anyone will ever notice when I'm through with you. Your jaw, nose, lip wired upside your face.
Sad, sad fact, kid. You could honestly wrestle a few more matches, and nothing would prepare you for me. If you lose, and still stick with the wrestling, you'll surprise the hell out of me.
But right now the most you can offer me is a pair of dice, and some roller skates? Hah, and you expect to be something in this fed? Kid, go back to doing the moonwalk, electric slide, or elvis impersonations. Whatever it was you did before you got the dishonor of facing me.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
We were born to make manifest the glory of god that is within us.
And as we let our own light shine.
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same"
__________________
The world needs change, such an innocent and naive statement. Yet one of those rare remarks that doesn't just fall into the category of an opinion, but an underlined fact, as well.
There's no emphasis needed on how every one chooses their own path, the true beauty is in the bliss. The only reward is in doing what speaks volumes for your own survival, in a caste less existence you live.
The first mistake you'll ever make in your life is not eating the inedible. Or taking a face-dive in the process of achieving your first steps. Oh no. Your first mistake comes when you have your innocence taken away from you and you're forced to react in ways undreamt.
While it happens to the best of us, no two cases are the same. Sure it's nothing to dread, by now you've moved on after briefly assuring yourself no one saw it. But it happened and from that point on forward your way of life will never be the same again.
That brings us to the present, to an individual that knows that thesis on life all to well.
A champion, Tha CBT, whose boarding a plane.
Nothing wrong with that, however it's an international passage and he has asked for the chance to speak uninterrupted to any one willing to listen, in a much needed phatic speech.
CBT: I don't even know where to begin, for now Mia, just listen... ok?
MP: Alright?
CBT: I'm one of the most open individuals you'll ever find. I can bullshit you to no end. But overall, I give my honest to god thoughts on a silver platter even if the dish is more appealing than the entree.
But that's beside the point, because I look at past mistakes, and I quickly realize. I'm not doing anything constructive, I'm not creating anything worth a damn.
I'm still young, but there's no denying that I'm "getting older" and so as time goes by anything I do is more or less of the same.
I don't address things that bother me, however all to often I give the people that at times resent me, every reason to think less of me.
I take a long look in the mirror at who I am, and what is being said about me. I can't even begin to express that in words and therefor I continue to become the rubiks cube that's already been solved.
I'm well aware that right now I should be preparing for my match, but I felt the need to take a trip.
I'm bringing Mia with me, not just as a conversation piece, but as a witness. To the true me.
Something many can't begin to embrace, but disparted with having any other choice but too.
_______________________
Like quick sand, I struggle to pull myself back up to a prominent stance, and it only does good to pull me in deeper.
I get attacked left and right for not paying mind to the events that transpire in front of me. Mainly and only because I don't care.
You think I sit online all day waiting for my name to be dropped? Or to come across a less than failed attempt at humor, in regards to my stance as a champion?
I don't live for such petty rabelais. I got real things to concern myself with, and it all begins with a little plane trip.
For those of you unaware, I am Lebanese. Or as you all like to refer to my people, an A'Rab. No CBT isn't looking to gain some heat and go all anti-xenophobic. It's a part of me, and one I'm very proud of. But no emphasis needs to be paid in mind to that.
You see, back around a year or so ago, I made my first trip to Beirut. With a budgetable income, I earned the right to put some money aside, and spend on something any other career might not put in front of me.
I went there really to get away, peace at mind, nothing really to be concerned with. Not to dissolute the reality that is a somber state. But I felt the need to see what essentially is a part of me.
Flash forward to present day, and not much has changed, but apparently hindsight is 20/20. I couldn't be more on with my analogy, because leaving the U.S. apparently isn't just leaving the country. It's committing treason or unpatriotic. It's also not very wise to wear a shirt that shows you're "one of them."
I dunno, a victim of circumstance I was, and for the first time in my life I couldn't even defend myself with words.
All of this means nothing, but my point is that something changed inside of me. I haven't quite decoded it in it's entirety, but it's gotta be for the better.
I got tapped on my shoulder shortly after as I boarded the plane, quickly being informed of the writing on my shirt says, "Hezbollah are the winners."
I have a new found respect, in what I respect.
___________________
Those who throw stones, don't care where they land, so long as they damage something. Much like a bomb, no matter where you stand on politics, no explanation can be given on the body count of innocent civilians.
It was once said, live by your country, you die by your country. But how often are you side by side with your own worst enemy. To a degree where death is the only resolution, and a white flag is an insinuation to attack harder, with no recourse.
Lebanon is a beautiful country; God's country.
But because of religion, you see them as inefficient, misguided, and not fully conscious of their own wrong doing.
Even worse is that is your view of them in their own environment, in your surroundings they are terrorists or up to no good. Not to intensify whether the matter of debate or deem it as be an opinion or a fact. It's just the first impression, that is all, and that's the way it will always be.
The man indeed in search of a spiritual cleansing, not for release, but angst has arrived along with his confidant. The strangest thing is his ranting and raving after surveying the scenery he had no time to see on his previous trip.
Mia Porter does her best to calm him down, but quickly she seen as an outcaste, in how she portrays her self as some one to be seen and heard, how foolish, but she'll soon learn.
MP: What exactly are we doing here Mark? I mean a few days ago you seemed excited about facing this Johnny guy, and than you tell me to pack my bag for a much needed get away?
CBT: Listen, Mia. I love the support you give me. Being able to confide in some one makes it seem as though I can and will do, with no question. But honestly, there's some things you're gonna need to learn quickly...
MP: Like what?
CBT: Like for instance, you coming here and showing your face, that's a luxury. You take that for grant it, but I could slap you, and nobody would say a damn word. Maybe they'd even cheer me on. Point being, you are here for the ride. Nothing less and nothing more. If you disrespect me in any way, you can find a way back to the states. Got it?
MP: I don't like this side of you, but I get that women are seen in a different light. That doesn't mean you gotta get all wife beater on me, but I'll respect the fact this trip is for you to reap the benefit.
CBT: Thank you and I'm sorry, far be it for me to take the stress out on you. But this is the first step in turning the page on a glorified slump.
: Excuse me sir?The voice sounds familiar, and quickly CBT revisits his time on the plane. Almost foreshadowing the all familiar tap...
: Excuse me. I noticed while talking to you on the plane, you seem to be, how you say... Americanized? Anyways, sir, my name is Taim Allah. You don't seem to be familiar with Arabic.CBT: Why d you say that, Mr Taim?
T'Allah: Because, for one, you seemed to not know what was worded on your shirt.
CBT: Well I kind of got it because it seemed authentic...
T'Allah: Did you buy in Beirut?
CBT: No in the United St...
T'Allah: It's not authentic. While it's a strong symbol, of both good and evil in the Muslim world. It's made in America, for profit, and thought less of by the makers than you do. But don't take my words to heart, kind sir.
CBT: Call me Mark, Taim. Believe it or not, I probably knew the translation, just been dropped on my head so much that I forgot it and only remember Farsi.
T'Allah: I see, well Mark, I'd like to talk to you about that shirt a little more. But first, who is the female that you traveled with, if you don't mind my asking?
CBT: Not at all, this is Mia Porter, she's not of Arabic descent. But she is a close friend, and not one of the reasons for me traveling here.
T'Allah: Well then, why did you come all this way? I assume to see what is Lebanon. But as I said, you will quickly be a target of praise and anger. You do know what is Hezbollah, I assume?
CBT: Not really, a sports team?
T'Allah: No. Not at all, You see what I was referring to about the mixed reaction you will get, here in not just Beirut but Lebanon as whole.
Hezbollah is what you would call militant soldiers. They fight for a cause, but to them it is for benefit, not for settlement. They have no attachment only pride in if they win or lose.
CBT: Alright, but where's the concern?
T'Allah: Well essentially, there should be none. As they are a political party, no different then that of a Democrat. They have a huge role in taking care of the people of Lebanon. However as a representative to the Shiites, they often time are the source of trouble.
CBT: Heh, well this little history lesson is all well and good, but it seems rather pointless to be telling me all this.
T'Allah: No sir, every thing in life, serves point. Good or bad, by design, there's meaning behind everything.
Like for instance, me meeting you. I was gonna introduce myself, but I was overcome by how you, a man who has Arabic features, but nothing to the extent of being targeted would be stopped over a t-shirt.
I'm familiar with you as a wrestler, but I wondered why more so you would walk away from such disrespect.
CBT: Well to be fair I didn't know what about the shirt, was such a concern.
T'Allah: I'm not talking about the shirt. I explained to you how a big part of your culture is run, and you pay no mind. Even as a wrestler, now more than ever, you're passive aggressive. You have no mind to look at things and confront them.
CBT: That's not true!
T'Allah: Quiet! You listened to me when I told you what your shirt said, and the only reason I told you was for you to respond in kind.
I didn't spend my first 20 minutes back in Beirut to be your tour guide.
I'm trying to help you in this so called journey. To bring the repugnance back. So you don't continue to be disrespected and veered, but rather respected and feared.
CBT: So what you just go from my nice, Taim Allah, to Kamikaze Ken?
T'Allah: Forget it, I didn't expect a race traitor to get it...
Quickly CBT grabs the condescending man by his collar, reaching his free arm as far back as humanly possible so when he lets go it'll leave a nice mark. Both based on the impact and the ring conveniently placed on the middle finger.
CBT: I oughta knock your ass out. But I won't, and you know why?
T'Allah: No. Tell me?
CBT: Because you're the person with the balls to look me eye to eye, and show me the reflection I haven't seen in months.
T'Allah: Well then, that brings me back to our earlier discussion. Do you understand the point I was trying to make?
CBT: I think so. That your actions, good or bad, will nonetheless get you where you've got to go.
T'Allah: No, not quite.
CBT: Than, I guess the common bond is, the bad guy gets more done than the good guy. He gets the notoriety, all the while achieving the goals, and still doing some good with out skipping a beat?
T'Allah: Exactly.
CBT: So while Mia's not distracting us, tell me more about these boys.
A real party of god, if you ask me.
__________________
You know what I regret? Nothing.
If I ever had a complaint about my way of living, it is that I get so easily distracted, I forget to make my move and cancel out everything that happens while I laid low.
Things like teaming with the one and only, EBR. While a good idea, at first. I've had my doubts.
I'll still take championship gold, at any cost, like someone before me said.. I'm a belt mark.
You don't have to like what you're doing in order to relish what you gain from doing it.
A guy like EBR needs me more than I need him, and I'll happily continue to aide him in his quest for continued success. But what eats him up, at least in my eyes, is that in our time spent together he has done nothing to help or hurt Tha CBT. That itself makes him inferior to me.
See I've given him success, without me there would be no tag team title. Hell there would be no opportunity, how quick we forget when our friends are in high places.
Oh I'll lay off him as a target, he's off my radar, for now... but soon, without the virtue of a rematch, we will cross paths, and I assure you, we will.
I won't attack him mid-match for the benefit of getting in his head, that's child's play.
Leave me to be the one that stands idly by, watching and awaiting his first of many failures. They will come, and soon he will be gone.
It's not even a falsehood, for pleasantry, but a necessity. A must.
The likes of Obo are not safe, either. I've always fancied myself as the kid with a short temper, you know who gets beat up by the big ogre of a bully, but one day just can't take it. One day he just snaps, and the bully untimely finds out how unbelievably stupid he was for torturing the kid when he could have just moved on and nourished the pride he had won.
It's all on the rebound now, no more henry jekyll, say hello to edward hyde.
The start of something beautiful will begin with some thing, or some one who should honestly see his name left off of cards when I'm through with him.
I mean, seriously. A greaser? Is this 1950's greaser or the rehash, 1970's trend happy greaser? Either way, I see this guy as nothing short of a poser.
Nothing he can say or do with get him respect he has not earned, and he has the nerve to bring up beating Obo... fuck you kid.
I will not lie, you've got a hell of an upside. But unfortunately that's all anyone will ever notice when I'm through with you. Your jaw, nose, lip wired upside your face.
Sad, sad fact, kid. You could honestly wrestle a few more matches, and nothing would prepare you for me. If you lose, and still stick with the wrestling, you'll surprise the hell out of me.
But right now the most you can offer me is a pair of dice, and some roller skates? Hah, and you expect to be something in this fed? Kid, go back to doing the moonwalk, electric slide, or elvis impersonations. Whatever it was you did before you got the dishonor of facing me.
But I do kind of wanna attempt something different, so at the least I gain something.
Sucks having the only computer with online to, all the while sharing it with my folks.
ing fingers hurt. 
I enjoyed telling a lucrative, or what I mean is, lengthy story. It's the first time in a while I feel good about what I wrote, if only because it wasn't done for showing up purposes but rather to expand and advance my own ideas.
