Up The Garden Path RP: Checkmate

[Danger10]

Mid-Morning

Still reeling from his loss at Twisted, Shapiro stops at a convenient store for some water after an intense workout when he runs into a passionate WFWF fan.

Teen in the store: Hey man, you're Shapiro!

Shapiro: Hey kid how's it going?

Teen, surprised and excited that he's meeting one of his idols, : What are you doing here?

Shapiro, laughing: Just came to get me something to drink.

Teen: Can I get a picture?

Shapiro: Sure kid.

The two of them strike a thumbs up pose as the kid snaps a picture.

Teen: Thanks, Shapiro.

Shapiro: No problem.

Teen: Are you nervous about your upcoming match at Up In The Garden Path?

Shapiro: A little, but all of that goes away once the bell rings.

Teen: I'm rooting for you to be the National Champion.

Shapiro: Thanks kid, but I got my work cut out for me. ACM, Ron Mexico and Axel Thornstowe are all rookies like me. Not much is known about any of us, but we all want to prove ourselves.

Teen: You don't know much about them do you?

Shapiro: No I don't kid.

Teen: I've seen tapes of The Wrestling Messiah, he's really good but a little full of himself.

Shapiro: Why do you say that?

Teen: Just look at his name: The Wrestling Messiah

Shapiro: Well duh, I should've been able to figure that one out.

Teen: Watch out for his Tiger Driver, it's pretty devastating.

Shapiro, surprised that the kid knows this much: Thanks kid. Do you have any other scouting tips?

Teen: Ron Mexico has a lot of diverse training, from MMA to boxing & now wrestling.

Shapiro: What do you know about Thornstowe?

Teen: Not much, nobody seems to know much about him.

Shapiro: No? Well thanks for the tips and information on the other two. It sounds like It's gonna be a rough night for me.

Teen: Yeah, well I'm pulling for you.

Shapiro: Thanks kid, I appreciate your support.

Shapiro purchases his water and exits the store. He decides to take a walk to clear his mind.

Man, I still can't believe I lost the last match. Oh well, gotta move on and focus on the next one. That kid said Mexico is well trained. I'm assuming he's a submission specialist due to his diverse training. ACM is big headed, arrogance will blind him at one point or another and I'll have to be ready to take advantage for when it does. Thornstowe Is a wild card. Regardless, I gotta put a strategy together, Fatal Four Way matches are like a game of Chess, you have to know what moves to make and when to make them If you want to be successful. But throw in the fact that we're all rookies and relatively unknown, I'd say a strategy will do me no good... What am I doing? There's no point in worrying about things I have no control over because I have no control over them. I have to focus on the things I can control. I'm going to have to just go with the flow and stay ready to take advantage of any and all mistakes these guys make. That'll be my strategy.

Well that's it, I figured out my strategy. Simple yet effective.

Shapiro enters his apartment, relaxed and focus. It's things like this that are the reason Shapiro likes to spend time alone before each match. Now he's got his strategy and is ready for his Fatal Four Way Match at Up In The Garden Path. It looks like everything is coming together for him.

[Danger10]

Sorry, but I phoned this one in to beat the deadline. I plan on getting a head start on my next RP sometime this week so I can hopefully deliver next time.

[Drakz]

Well this was another RP from this show that featured a child/teen for no reason other than for the protagonist to bounce dialogue off talking about their match. I'd rather people just wrote a locationless monologue personally.

Obviously you knocked this together to beat the deadline and in this instance it means you've won because everyone else no showed which is a bummer. I'm looking forward to seeing what you put out with more time and effort behind you.

Also one thing I've noticed a lot of people doing when their character meets a WFWF fan is this:

"Teen, surprised and excited that he's meeting one of his idols"

One of his idols? Shapiro has had one match at the bottom of the card. How many kids do you think would idolize him if this were real life? It's not just you, I've seen so many people write stuff like this when they're either new to the fed or simply not that good. You need to consider how a fan would really react if he saw a guy who had only appeared on the TV once. Would he even recognize you? It's something to play off if he didn't. Food for thought brother.

[bad guy™]

Jul 30, 2014 12:27:43 GMT -5 Drakz said:

Well this was another RP from this show that featured a child/teen for no reason other than for the protagonist to bounce dialogue off talking about their match. I'd rather people just wrote a locationless monologue personally.

Obviously you knocked this together to beat the deadline and in this instance it means you've won because everyone else no showed which is a bummer. I'm looking forward to seeing what you put out with more time and effort behind you.

Also one thing I've noticed a lot of people doing when their character meets a WFWF fan is this:

"Teen, surprised and excited that he's meeting one of his idols"

One of his idols? Shapiro has had one match at the bottom of the card. How many kids do you think would idolize him if this were real life? It's not just you, I've seen so many people write stuff like this when they're either new to the fed or simply not that good. You need to consider how a fan would really react if he saw a guy who had only appeared on the TV once. Would he even recognize you? It's something to play off if he didn't. Food for thought brother.

My idol is Kzarny. Just sayin'.

[jdfranchise]

Hey dude everything you write starting out is learning experience. And I think that the best learning experience you can take from your first two matches is what you already admitted to, which is planning out your rps in advance is a great place to start. It works for two pretty important reasons: 1. It allows you to think up concepts that you want to accomplish in order to develop your character, and 2. It gives you plenty of time to flesh out said concepts in order to put your best foot forward each time out.

As far as what you actually gave us this show, I think you've shown us that you grasp the basics of what goes into a standard scene (narrative, dialogue, voice, etc.) Now what I want to see from you moving forward is expand that understanding and really take a big bite into Shapiro. Use some of his past experiences to show that drive he has, because experience is a good vehicle to show us where we've come from to get where we are.

It's unfortunate that your opponents flaked on you, but I think that you being willing to do a bit of research on your opponents served you well here and really helped you through the dialouge. Listen, almost everyone here has asked for help at some point, so don't be afraid to ask someone when you get stuck. Keep sticking around and trying and you'll see how you writing improves.