Post by King Richius on Jan 19, 2019 14:19:09 GMT -5
WFWF Resolution presents:
Grow a Pair
A Daphne Velasquez RP
When life puts you in tough situations don’t say ‘Why me?’, say ‘Try me’.
Grow a Pair
A Daphne Velasquez RP
When life puts you in tough situations don’t say ‘Why me?’, say ‘Try me’.
Then
Abraham climbs the stairs to his office in the Legacy facilities. He hates how much his knees hurt and that he HAS to hold onto the hand rail to be sure he doesn’t fall. Ten years ago he would have been taking these steps two at a time. Not anymore. Age and years of abuse in the boxing ring took their toll.
He hides it well. If anybody knew, they might understand why he was always in a cranky mood for fifteen minutes every time he had to climb these damn stairs to his office. They would understand the bottle of scotch in the bottom drawer of his desk. On the really bad days they might even forgive him the bottle of prescription pain pills that did not have his name on it next to the scotch.
Today was going to be a scotch only day, one shot, maybe two.
After what felt like forever but was actually less than a minute, he finishes his ascent of the damnable stairs and is a few feet from his office door.
A door that is partially open.
Which was not how he left it when he went downstairs for lunch.
Abraham distinctly remembers closing and locking the door.
He is not amused. The old and tired Abe gives way to the young and fit Abe. He puffs up his chest and storms into his office ready to give someone hell.
Who the hell is in my office?!
Hey Abe, what’s shakin’?
All the anger rushes out of Abraham like air escaping a balloon. Daphne Velasquez is sitting behind his desk in his very comfortable leather chair with her feet propped up on his desk and drinking his scotch straight from the bottle like she owns the place.
There are only two people Abe would forgive for trespassing in his private office: his partner Frank Lynn and Daphne. Frank for obvious reasons. He had his own key because the office was as much his as it was Abe’s. Daphne was his favorite. Insert your own noun after, it’s all true: wrestler, employee, friend, drinking buddy,…
Not even Sarah would dare enter Abe’s office without him there and she was Abe’s COO and soon to be partner-in-law whenever she and Frank finally tied the knot.
That’s how much Daphne means to him. Daphne was practically family to a lonely old man. She had the run of Legacy with Abe’s blessing.
Want your chair back?
Nah. You look too comfortable.
Abe takes a seat in one of the decidedly less comfortable guest chairs in his office. Daphne swings her legs off of Abe’s desk, a sign of respect. A small sign since she could have not put them on the desk in the first place but if it bothered Abe, he didn’t show it.
You could give me some of MY scotch. There’s glasses in the drawer for us civilized types.
Ouch.
Daphne makes a pouty face.
My feelings should be hurt but I’m in too good a mood today.
She rummages around in Abe’s desk, pulls out two glasses, and pours some of scotch into each. She passes one to Abe, then holds her glass up to his.
Cheers.
Down the hatch.
They each drain their glasses, slowly so they can enjoy the flavor before the alcohol gets into their systems for its more desirable side effect.
So what has you in such a good mood on this fine day?
Good news. Scratch that. Great news!
Daphne pours some more Scotch into their glasses. They each drink, but only taking little sips. It wouldn’t do for either to get drunk in the middle of the day in front of the Legacy staff, at least one or two who make some extra cash feeding rumors to the dirt sheets run by Hickenbottom, Slipp, and Neal.
While I am enjoying the scotch I am not enjoying the suspense. You look like the cat that ate the canary so talk.
I saw the doctors today. The second surgery was a success.
She leans forward, propping her elbows on the desk, her chin resting on her crossed hands, and looks at him, very seriously at first, then slowly she starts to smile until she has an ear to ear sh*t eating grin on her face.
I’m cleared to wrestle Abe. I. Am. Cleared. To. Wrestle!
That’s good news worth another drink!
They hold their glasses up, clink them together, and take a long celebratory drink. They lean back in their chairs and Daphne confidently whips her feet back onto the desk. He absolutely does not mind.
Abe’s too busy almost losing his balance because he is used to his chair and you can’t lean as far back in the guest chairs without falling backwards. He flails his arms and legs crazily trying to not fall on his ass and spill his drink. It takes a bit but he manages to stay upright in the chair. He looks at Daphne and makes the goofiest grin you can imagine.
His miscue opens the dam on their good vibes and it releases in raucous laughter.
That did not happen. If you speak of it to anybody I will deny it vehemently AND fire you.
More laughter.
You know I have to tell Frank. He needs to laugh more and this will definitely do the trick.
Don’t you dare!
That settles it. I’m telling Frank.
Daphne makes finger gun that she points at Abe, pulls the trigger, and mouths the words “Bang bang”.
I knew it. You’re evil.
I’ll drink to that!
They both do. Their glasses are empty again. Daphne pours more scotch into hers, offers some to Abe but he passes. Two glasses is more than enough. He does have to get some work done this afternoon.
Serious question. Do you want to come back? And if so, how soon?
You already know the first answer. Yes, I’m coming back. There’s another wrestler carrying around a title I never lost.
If you want a title shot, it’s yours. Just tell me when.
Not yet. I have to work off the ring rust. And…
She stops in mid-sentence as if unsure she wants to say more. Too late. Abe is hooked.
Don’t leave me hanging. And…
There’s something I want to take care of first. Somebody who needs a life lesson that only I can teach her.
Her? Don’t play the pronoun game with me. I want details.
Again Daphne pauses. She’s deep in thought wondering how much she wants to tell Abe. Finally, after an uncomfortably long awkward silence, she takes another drink and speaks again.
The blue haired pixie. Smurfette. Stupid silly little girly girl Mesh.
Now Abe is the one struck silent. He is familiar with Mesh, as anyone who is friend and business partner with the current WFWF International Champion would be. She seems like a nice girl who is having unprecedented success as a WFWF rookie. What could Mesh have done to make an enemy of Daphne?
What has that innocent girl done to you?
She spits in the face of everything I stand for.
That tells him nothing. Abe waits silently for Daphne to say more, his questioning stare applying all the pressure to crack Daphne’s somewhat steely exterior.
I don’t know if I can explain it. Just trust me, she’s bad for business… for me… for you… for everybody in professional wrestling.
Abe sighs. He knows when Daphne has said all she is going to say. If he keeps pressing her, all he will get is more cryptic comments that will keep him up at night trying to figure out.
You do what you have to. All I ask is that you give me advance notice when you’re coming back to Legacy so I can book your title match asap.
Will do bossman. It really shouldn’t take me long. Mesh isn’t the sharpest nail in the toolbox.
Which is part of the reason Daphne is about to embark on a very unpopular course of action.
I’m pretty sure I know exactly how to poke and prod her into getting what I want.
When you put it like that… you scare me.
Daphne smiles, a much less congenial and more villainous smile that only adds to Abe’s fear factor.
It’s not you who should be scared. It’s Mesh.
Abe believes every word of it and he knows exactly what he has to do now.
One, stay out of Daphne’s business until she finishes with poor unsuspecting Mesh.
Two, get ready to crown a new Legacy Women’s Champion when Daphne is done with poor unsuspecting Mesh.
Three, call Frank and warn him that Hurricane Daphne is coming.
Now
“Bad Mama Jama” plays on Daphne’s phone, breaking her away from a video of Mesh/Shuggy II. That specific song means it’s Lila. Daphne made her new theme song Lila’s ring tone as a reminder: professional wrestling is about taking names and kicking ass. No matter how others may act, if they don’t get that then they won’t get far. It’s a lesson she plans to teach to Mesh… the hard way.
Hello Lila.
Hello Daphne.
What’s on your mind?
Daphne frowns as she doesn’t really care what Lila wants, she just wants the call over as quickly as possible. What she’s seen of Lila as Frank’s manager hasn’t exactly impressed her.
Just calling to check in with my new top prospect. Did you sign all the paperwork and send it back?
She scoffs at “top prospect”. Is that sincerity or flattery? Lord knows the WFWF roster needs all the help it can get but would Lila really put that much stock in someone coming off a serious, almost career ending injury?
Si. FedEx’d it yesterday.
And you have your flight ticket and hotel reservation?
Si. Gracias.
Well then, looks like everything is set for the debut of La Pantera Negra.
Indeed. Anything else?
A brief pause. Daphne really hopes the answer is no.
I just wanted to tell you that I didn’t give you this match just because you harassed Mesh into it. Despite appearances, that’s not how it works.
She scoffs again. Contrary to what Lila just said, that is exactly how it works in the WFWF. Daphne found it far too easy to manipulate the system.
Doesn’t matter to me why you made the match. I’m getting what I want.
*sigh* What I’m trying to say is that I’ve had my eye on you for years, long before we signed Frank away from Legacy. You’re an internationally recognized name that would be a great addition to the WFWF roster.
Daphne takes notice that Lila said “from Legacy” and not “from the GFL”. A subtle reminder that Lila thinks she is in charge because of her blackmail scheme? Frank might have something to say about that but for now he’s keeping his plans to himself.
Regardless, the real point is Lila is buttering up Daphne for spot on the WFWF roster but not before she jumps through some hoops first.
If I beat Mesh?
Not necessarily. Just put on a good show. There’s a spot for you in the WFWF if you want it.
Again, is this sincerity or flattery. Lila is so slimy it’s hard to tell. She is the woman who blackmailed Frank into making Daphne eye candy. Daphne is not one to let that slide. She’s not averse to using her assets to her advantage but only when and where she chooses!
That’s good to know but I’m not into the whole shake my ass for the pervs thing you want me to do. All I care about right now is getting my hands on smurfette.
Don’t get me wrong. As Frank’s manager, yes, I’d prefer if you were seen and not heard. Honestly, Frank is plain white bread without the spice you bring to his act but you can get a little extra spicy if you know what I mean. As an active wrestler, you can say or do anything you want… within reason of course.
Good to know. But you should know, I haven’t made up my mind about what I’m doing after this match.
A lie. Daphne’s mind was made up about the WFWF long before she started on her anti-Mesh campaign.
Well think about it. I would even give you a match with Ante Whitner if you wanted it.
HA! Frank’s taken care of that a-hole for me… and will again if he wins the number one contender’s match.
Damn you’re one tough nut to crack. I’m going to keep trying though. I want you in the WFWF as more than a manager.
Daphne knows what Lila really means. She wants another warm body to feed to the meat grinder. Hell, this woman would welcome back Trace Demon with open arms and a big fat bonus if he ever wakes up. She stinks of desperation.
I’m just sayin’, don’t hold your breath waiting for me to make up my mind.
More lies. As long as Lila believes there is a chance, she won’t do something stupid with the match that would make life harder. Allowing Anna Ahriman to get involved already complicated matters more than Daphne would like.
Are you seriously telling me all you want is a match with Mesh and then back to Legacy?
That’s one possibility.
We’ll see how you feel after wrestling in front of tens of thousands of fans instead of a few hundred in a bingo hall.
I’ve wrestled in front of large crowds before. It’s overrated.
Daphne wonders if Lila understands wrestling in the 21st century. You can have a five star classic in front of a few hundred people, post it to YouTube, and wait for word of mouth to get you as many views as any of those bar room brawls the WFWF regularly holds in front of thousands of fans. Then they go to your website and buy your merch. That’s where the real money is.
We’ll see.
Yep, we’ll see.
We’ll talk more in LA. ’Til then, take care.
Cya’ in LA.
Now that the call is over, Daphne relaxes and smiles. She has the upper hand in this business relationship and it makes her feel good. It’s nice to have options even when the choice has already been made.
Then
Daphne saunters into the deep recesses of the Legacy facilities where the techies, geeks, and nerds hang out all day working on the audio and visual elements of the Legacy shows, maintain the Legacy servers for the internet subscription service, and produce a new DVD every so often.
She makes her way to a techie she knows, Bruce Eckhardt. As soon as she steps into his cubicle, she can feel his butt clenching. He blushes and stammers whenever Daphne is around. It’s obvious he has a crush on Daphne. Its also equally obvious that he has no chance, at least not until his acne clears up, he loses about fifty pounds, gets a decent haircut, and learns to dress with at least some small semblance of style. A stained Pokemon t-shirt? Really?
Daphne sighs internally. They can’t all be Frank Lynn but would it be so hard if just one or two of them came close. Inside every nerd is a sexy beast if he just makes the effort.
Hi Bruce. How ya’ doin’?
Hi D-D-D-Daphne. I’m g-g-good.
She sits on the edge of his desk and puts her hand on his shoulder, which will either calm him down or make his heart explode.
I need a favor and you’re just the man to do it. You interested?
Bruce can barely contain himself as he blurts out his response.
Sure, anyth-th-thing for you!
That’s great because what I need could take a while.
N-N-N-No problem.
Awesome. See, I’m making a comeback and I need some special promo videos and a new entrance video. You sure you can squeeze this in with all your regular work?
Of course he can but it’s polite to ask. Just because she is taking advantage of a smitten puppy doesn’t mean she can’t pet it and give it a few treats.
I’ll work l-l-l-late if I h-h-h-have to.
And so they get work, Daphne describing what she wants and Bruce assuring her he can have it done within a week.
A mostly uneventful week passes, except for a session with Bruce where Daphne had to do some filming in her wrestling attire in front of a green screen. Bruce did his best to hide his excitement but he was pitching a tent the entire shoot. She kept her eyes up at all times to avoid embarrassing him further.
After the week passes, Daphne heads to Bruce’s cubicle to see what he came up with.
He’s all smiles as he gallantly pulls a chair out for her to sit in so they can both see the wall of monitors in front of him. It looks like he tried cleaning his cubicle too. There is just about as much junk before but now it’s in neat piles instead of scattered haphazardly around his work area.
It’s all d-d-done. What do you w-w-w-want to see first?
Let’s start with the promos.
Bruce moves the mouse around one of the screens faster than Daphne can follow and seconds later she is watching his handiwork: a video of Smurfette dancing through a jungle with a basket full of smurfberries, whatever the hell Smurfberries are, and then a black panther pounces on Smurfette and bites her head off.
I like that. Really nice work Bruce.
Thanks D-D-D-Daphne! Want to see the second promo?
Absolutely!
More rapid mouse movements and they are watching another video. The camera view is zooming through the jungle underbrush while the sounds of something large and hungry chewing on something tasty are heard. The racing camera breaks into a clearing to reveal a black panther enjoying a meal of a panda plushie.
That’s f***ing perfect. What was that zooming effect?
It’s a Kandarian demon coming to possess a human soul. I, um, kinda’ borrowed the effect from Evil Dead. I hope you don’t mind.
Daphne hugs Bruce and exclaims:
I have no idea what any of that meant but I love it! You have outdone yourself Bruce.
Wow, thanks. I wasn’t sure if you’d like it but these promo vids have a, um, dark undertone to them. I thought it fit.
Daphne certainly hopes so. They’re supposed to make the real life Smurfette shake in her wrestling boots.
It does. It’s perfect.
Bruce looks at her, no longer blushing or stammering. He is in his comfort zone talking about and showing off his work.
Can I ask you something?
He doesn’t wait for an answer.
Why do want promos showing you… the black panther is obviously you, right… eating smurfs and stuffed animals?
You can ask but it’s probably better that I don’t answer.
Daphne doesn’t think he needs to know that she’s going hunting and the prey is a blue haired pixie that odds are Bruce is a fan of… just like every other gullible wrestling fan who is missing the bigger picture.
Why don’t you show me my new entrance video?
Um, okay.
More rapid mouse movements and a third video window opens up. The new La Pantera Negra entrance video plays. It takes all of five seconds for Daphne to fall in love with it. The black panther looks so damn real and the music gets her blood pumping. Four minutes later Daphne is all smiles. It was Bruce’s best work yet.
Bruce, I don’t think Abe pays you enough. You are a f***ing genius.
Daphne can actually see Bruce’s chest swell with pride. He sits up straighter and smiles.
You really like it? It’s not like any of the other women’s entrances I’ve produced. They usually get sparkly graphics and pop songs. It’s so much, um, happier than this one.
Daphne almost growls at him. He just hit the nail on the head of what is wrong with professional wrestling.
I don’t want something girly. I want something that any man in the locker room could use for their entrance. Brittany Spears and Taylor Swift can suck a d*ck. I want hard driving, bone shaking rock music that says “I’m the baddest b*tch in the building ready to kick some ass.”
She ruffles Bruce’s hair affectionately.
That is exactly what you gave me. It’s perfect.
Daphne leans in close and kisses him on the cheek.
Seriously, ask Abe for a raise. Tell him I said you deserve it.
I will.
Daphne hides her skepticism. He won’t. His bravado will disappear as soon as she leaves his cubicle. Poor boy destined to slave away producing greatness for minimum wage because he doesn’t have the confidence to go to his boss and say “I deserve a raise.”
Can you burn a DVD of all three videos for me? That should be all any show producer needs to play them, right?
Yep, most production setups can handle multiple video sources including DVD. I already made one for you. Just let me find it…
Daphne watches patiently as Bruce fumbles around in a stack of discs until he finds the right one. He’s so enthusiastic he almost throws it at her, then almost drops it, before finally managing to hand it to her.
Thanks again Bruce. I owe you one. I know it’s not much, but maybe I could take you to lunch some time.
I’d like th-th-that.
The stammer is back. Daphne went too far too fast for him. So much potential though. A makeover, a diet, some contacts, and who knows? Bruce could be a keeper but the nervous stammer is a killer. Conversations would be so painful.
One more tiny little favor. Can you keep this just between us for now? It’s a surprise.
S-S-S-Sure. Mum’s the w-w-word.
She stuffs the DVD into her bag, blows Bruce a kiss, and saunters out of the production area. She’s all smiles. Her plan to get to Mesh is falling into place.
But first, a quick stop in Abe’s office to let him know Bruce deserves a raise. He won’t ask so she’ll do it for him. It’s the least she can do.
Now
You ever play “opposites day” as a kid? That’s what the world is like for Daphne. She’s the wrestler preparing for a big match while Frank Lynn is the one standing ringside shouting instructions and motivation during her sparring sessions.
The experience only serves to remind her that Frank Lynn is one of the best technical wrestlers in the world as he not only sees every flaw in her game but provides spot on advice for correcting her mistakes.
It’s all good times for the two of them until the training is over and Frank once again starts grilling Daphne about her motives, trying to get some insight that he can turn into more motivation for his manager in her WFWF try out match.
Let’s try it again. Please explain to me in terms a stupid male can understand. What is it about Mesh that rubs you the wrong way?
I don’t know if I can put it in a way you’ll understand. You never had to go through what a female wrestler has. You can’t relate to me, Scarlett Quinn, Penny Shannon, and Mesh.
Try me.
Daphne has to give Frank credit. He really does want to understand. That’s more than most male wrestlers would do.
Let me start by asking you a question. Have you ever been referred to as a MALE professional wrestler?
No.
That’s the problem. Not a day goes by when Mesh or I aren’t referred to as a FEMALE professional wrestler.
And…
It’s not so bad in the case of Penny or myself because we don’t care. We go out there and do our thing. We fight against the label. But Mesh… she embraces it, flaunts it, will eventually get buried by it.
Frank, who had been following her attentively up to that point, shakes his head. Daphne’s logic lost him somewhere around Mesh getting buried because she’s too feminine.
She’s done well for herself so far.
Now it is Daphne’s turn to shake her head.
What happened to you? At first you were leading the pack telling her to stop LOL tweeting after getting her face bashed in. Now you’re defending her. Why? Because she drools all over you every time you’re in the same room?
Frank blushes. He won’t admit it but it has to feel good that at least one other WFWF wrestler actually likes him, respects him, and doesn’t want to rip his head off so they can mount it above their fireplace.
You don’t have to answer. It doesn’t matter anyway. Bottom line, Mesh needs to toughen up, both for herself and for an entire generation of Good Vibe Tribe sycophants she is leading down a path to destruction.
She’s monologuing like a Bond villain right before a failed attempt to eliminate the super spy, complete with back and forth pacing and wild hand gestures.
Professional wrestling, particularly the WFWF, is not a place for nice guys. You learned that. Mesh needs to learn that too. You simply do not laugh off a beating. You don’t run across the room fangirling over your competition. You don’t shake the hand of an opponent who just beat your ass.
Frank visibly grimaces at the last comment, it obviously being in reference to his match with Mesh where he won and they shared a moment of respect afterwards that Mesh took a little too far. Mesh certainly loves to hug.
So you’re going to beat some sense into her for her own good?
Si. She says I used to be an idol of hers. Fine. That makes me the perfect person to toughen her up.
If you say so. I’m staying out of this. You’re on your own.
Daphne scowls at Frank.
Because you disapprove?
Don’t confuse not understanding with not approving. It’s just that I can’t be a part of it, not right now. I have enough problems with Whitner and Draven crawling up my ass. I don’t need to add Mesh or Anna Ahriman to the list.
Daphne growls, as if the mere mention of Anna Ahriman brings out a literal black panther inside her.
Stupid puta. I don’t believe for a second that she got involved out of some concern for Mesh’s safety. She must be even stupider than her tweets if she believes you would interfere.
She’s an Ahriman. They seem to live on the edge of delusion.
She better be true to her word and stay out of it as long as you stay out of it. If not, I’ll gladly kick her ass after I’m done with Mesh.
I bet you would.
You should bet on it. It’s easy money.
The conversation pauses, Daphne thinking about how much she would enjoy shutting up Anna while teaching Mesh her lesson and Frank twiddling his thumbs unsure if he wants to ask the next question on his mind.
So, um, after the match… what’s next? Are you gonna’ take Lila up on her offer of a full time contract?
Are you worried you could be losing your manager?
In a word, yes. I can go it alone but I’d prefer not to.
Daphne puts a reassuring hand on Frank’s leg and looks him straight in the eyes.
You have nothing to worry about. No matter what happens at Resolution, I’m not signing a WFWF contract. I’m fine managing you while you take all the risks. I’m not so fine with taking those risks myself.
She rubs her neck, not even realizing she’s doing it until after the fact.
I already had my neck broke. I’ve seen careers ended and lives put in jeopardy. It’s not pretty.
It’s obvious who she is talking about: Trace Demon. Certainly not high on the list of people either Frank or Daphne would put on their Christmas card list but both still pity Trace for what Tyler Draven and Lila Sleater did to him. He may have been a first class piece of sh*t but even he deserved better. It’s no wonder a seasoned, confident wrestler like Daphne wouldn’t want to potentially put herself in that position.
If it can happen to Trace Demon, it can happen to anybody, eh?
Exactly. You tried to change the WFWF but failed. It’s like the wild wild west. That’s not my style. I’d rather wrestle in Legacy against other women. Abe runs a better promotion, a safer promotion. Allen Neal can suck it if he thinks that makes me less of a wrestler than some psycho f*** like Needles or a shooting star like Shuggy.
Valid point. You never know when one of those psychos is gonna’ pull a Schneider on you.
Daphne knows it isn’t the attack Schneider perpetrated that bothers Frank. It’s the fact that he never got a chance at payback because Schneider disappeared afterwards and hasn’t been heard from since. It’s what separates the Frank Lynn’s of the world from the Mesh’s. One seeks payback while the other makes LOL tweets. One is hard while the other is soft.
That’s why smurfette needs to toughen up. She won’t survive if someone strings her up like… how did you put it?
She pauses as she searches her memory, Frank waiting for her to come up with the right phrase by herself instead of jumping in.
Oh yeah… like Christ on a cross in the middle of the ring. She’ll crack like Humpty Dumpty and there won’t be enough king’s men and king’s horses to put her back together again.
So you’re kicking her ass for her own good?
He’s repeating himself now, trying to wrap his head around that Daphne is acting out of good will by teaching Mesh how to survive in the WFWF. She wonders if he still sees Daphne’s vendetta as being driven by jealousy?
Si. Smurfette must die so that Mesh can become someone better equipped to deal with the sh*t storms that are sure to come her way… and the way of anybody who tries to follow in her footsteps.
La Pantera Negra, professor of the school of hard knocks, molding the next generation with her own special brand of tough love.
Frank still doesn’t sound entirely convinced but he’s trying and Daphne appreciates that. It’s no wonder he needs her around. He still hasn’t shed all the naïveté of his MMA days. A large part of Daphne’s job as his manager is to remind him of the differences between the GFL and the WFWF.
You know it! I’ll be the bad guy if that’s what it takes for Mesh to become the wrestler she needs to be… for herself… for the WFWF… for all the girls in the Good Vibe Tribe who look up to her.
Resolution
Hello Mesh.
Time for some real talk.
Sit down, shut up (for once in your life), and listen closely.
I don’t want you to die. In fact, I want the exact opposite. I want you to thrive. I want you to make a name for yourself in the WFWF like no other wrestler. I want you to inspire a whole new generation wrestlers who will make the fans forget Thunder, McGurk, Malakai, Schneider, Kyzer, Drakz, Demon, Brennan, and even my good friend Frank Lynn who have dominated the WFWF up to now.
I have my doubts that you can do it though. Very serious doubts you will even last another year before it all comes crashing down. Abandoned by the Good Vibe Tribe because they finally saw through the flashy exterior to see the true Mesh. A failure whose legacy is one of lost opportunity and shame.
Why you ask?
Because you have failed to take the advice I gave you all those years ago when I visited your wrestling school. I told you to stand out and be different because “women have it harder in this business”.
Apparently my words went in one ear and right out the other.
You haven’t done a single damn thing to stand out from every other woman who has preceded you in the WFWF. In fact, you’ve gone backwards, flaunting your sugar and spice and everything nice Mickey Mouse Club image with the blue hair, the dancing and prancing, the selfies and vlogs, the plushies and pinatas, the spreading of magical pixie dust that has enchanted the masses.
You just don’t get it.
The whole goody two shoes act is a cancer. You can’t take a baseball bat to the face and then laugh it off with a stupid tweet. You’re sending the message that just being here is enough.
That’s not the best message to send to the next generation of women who want to be wrestlers.
You need to be “one of the boys”. You need to make everyone forget you’re even a woman. That’s true equality - when Daniel Knight calls you a wrestler, no extra adjectives pointing out you don’t have a penis.
I’m here to make sure it isn’t too late for you.
How you ask?
I will teach you by example.
I will beat the holy hell out of you until it finally sinks in.
Stop with the dancing and prancing. Stop with the “Oh you broke my face but I got the win so LOL everybody dance now!” Stop with the hugging and crying every time Frank or Penny or some other idol of yours is within reach. Do you really think drooling all over the other wrestlers is impressing anybody?
If you only hear one thing I say then let it be this: Grow a f***ing pair!
I’m talking about a big and hairy swinging down around your knees set of brass balls.
Because if you don’t I’m going to end you before you do even more damage to the next generation of young women who might venture into the world of professional wrestling.
If you can’t be a good example then you won’t be any example at all.
I won’t allow it.
Did you know that Smurfs taste like blueberries. Mmm tasty.
La Pantera Negra is hungry.
Grow a pair or I’m going to eat you alive.
