Post by bad guy™ on Apr 8, 2012 14:01:16 GMT -5
Oh, I remember the good ol' days when it would be me or Pats posting these. I figured, why not jump the gun for a while and get what should be a HUGE RAW started a day early, eh?
Last Monday, John Laurinaitis opened up the show by invoking what he called "People's Power" on the WWE...by punishing the former Captain of Team Teddy, US Champion Santino Marella, by forcing him to defend his championship in a Triple Threat match consisting of Vicky's Boys, Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger. Thanks to Ziggler and Swagger turning on each other, Santino picked up the surprising win. And thanks to Brodus Clay, Dolph Ziggler got absolutely buried on the entrance way post match. And thanks to the Funkasaurettes, we got a dance party. What will be the repercussions of such epicness? Will Funk still be allowed to roll? Will someones Mama be called?
Also in the opening of the show, the announcement that WWE Champion CM Punk would be defending his championship against Team Johnny member Mark Henry was made. That match ended in count out after Henry brutally eliminated CM Punk from the equation. After the match, Henry continued his onslaught, and then Chris Jericho joined the party, talking trash and then ultimately pouring a bottle of Jack down Punk's throat and smashing another one over his head. It got worse for Punk when Mr. Excitement came out and announced that CM Punk had a Natural Disaster coming his way. What's that Natural Disaster? One can only hope a Hurricane or an F-5, presuming he doesn't hit Rock Bottom.
The Rock came out and made everyone laugh for a good few minutes, delivering a classic Rock promo before he dropped a bombshell on us. The Rock is making it his mission to once again reclaim the WWE Championship. That's HUGE, and that is CLEARLY the biggest thing that happened on RAW, right?
Lord Tensai squashed Alex Riley in a match only WF cared about, and then proceeded to burn Riley's eyes via a direct rip off of Tajari's famed Poison Mist. Will it be revealed that Tajari's suing for royalties? Potentially.
Sheamus came out and talked some smack before he was interrupted by Alberto Del Rio...and more importantly, by the stunning lungs of Ricardo Rodriguez...or as King calls him, Ricky Ricardo. Del Rio talked about how he was going to be the next challenger for Sheamus's championship should he win on Smackdown. Luckily before he could say anymore, he was kicked in the face. Did Del Rio earn his title shot? Tune in.
I blinked at about halfway through. There may or may not have been a Diva's match. The Miz wrestled Zack Ryder too. I think it may have even been the Main Event. Maybe. I honestly forget.
The show concluded with John Cena brown-nosing The Rock. I didn't even hear a penis joke. Cena called The Rock out, and he didn't come out. And that was about it.
Tu...
Wait. I forgot something. Instead of The Rock, BROCK ING LESNAR came out, and blew the roof off of the arena. Lesnar circled the ring for a moment and then entered, offering his hand to John Cena. And luckily, just when we all thought we had just been Jeritrolled by Lesnar, he killed John Cena via F-5 and stood tall as we faded to black.
Can this weeks RAW live up to last weeks? Tune it at 9/8PM Central to find out.
Oh, and congrats to Pats on becoming WWE MOD. Haha.
Last Monday, John Laurinaitis opened up the show by invoking what he called "People's Power" on the WWE...by punishing the former Captain of Team Teddy, US Champion Santino Marella, by forcing him to defend his championship in a Triple Threat match consisting of Vicky's Boys, Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger. Thanks to Ziggler and Swagger turning on each other, Santino picked up the surprising win. And thanks to Brodus Clay, Dolph Ziggler got absolutely buried on the entrance way post match. And thanks to the Funkasaurettes, we got a dance party. What will be the repercussions of such epicness? Will Funk still be allowed to roll? Will someones Mama be called?
Also in the opening of the show, the announcement that WWE Champion CM Punk would be defending his championship against Team Johnny member Mark Henry was made. That match ended in count out after Henry brutally eliminated CM Punk from the equation. After the match, Henry continued his onslaught, and then Chris Jericho joined the party, talking trash and then ultimately pouring a bottle of Jack down Punk's throat and smashing another one over his head. It got worse for Punk when Mr. Excitement came out and announced that CM Punk had a Natural Disaster coming his way. What's that Natural Disaster? One can only hope a Hurricane or an F-5, presuming he doesn't hit Rock Bottom.
The Rock came out and made everyone laugh for a good few minutes, delivering a classic Rock promo before he dropped a bombshell on us. The Rock is making it his mission to once again reclaim the WWE Championship. That's HUGE, and that is CLEARLY the biggest thing that happened on RAW, right?
Lord Tensai squashed Alex Riley in a match only WF cared about, and then proceeded to burn Riley's eyes via a direct rip off of Tajari's famed Poison Mist. Will it be revealed that Tajari's suing for royalties? Potentially.
Sheamus came out and talked some smack before he was interrupted by Alberto Del Rio...and more importantly, by the stunning lungs of Ricardo Rodriguez...or as King calls him, Ricky Ricardo. Del Rio talked about how he was going to be the next challenger for Sheamus's championship should he win on Smackdown. Luckily before he could say anymore, he was kicked in the face. Did Del Rio earn his title shot? Tune in.
I blinked at about halfway through. There may or may not have been a Diva's match. The Miz wrestled Zack Ryder too. I think it may have even been the Main Event. Maybe. I honestly forget.
The show concluded with John Cena brown-nosing The Rock. I didn't even hear a penis joke. Cena called The Rock out, and he didn't come out. And that was about it.
Tu...
Wait. I forgot something. Instead of The Rock, BROCK ING LESNAR came out, and blew the roof off of the arena. Lesnar circled the ring for a moment and then entered, offering his hand to John Cena. And luckily, just when we all thought we had just been Jeritrolled by Lesnar, he killed John Cena via F-5 and stood tall as we faded to black.
Can this weeks RAW live up to last weeks? Tune it at 9/8PM Central to find out.
Oh, and congrats to Pats on becoming WWE MOD. Haha.